A light in the darkness
by Ainsel3
Summary: What would have happened if the Yoite's family had managed an orphanage? And if Miharu after the death of his parents had gone to live there?
1. the new child

**My first long fiction of Nabari, does not seem true ****

**The first chapter is not far along, but you have to take it more as a prologue. The basic idea is a big what if ... that has fascinated me ever since I started to reflect on the past of Yoite.**

**I'd love to hear your views ^^**

* * *

Sora had always found it difficult to scan the passage of time by the immobility of the four walls in which he was forced to live, but even if its the world outside the cellar came in a distant way somehow he never failed to sense when something happened different from the usual.  
He knew when his father - or the director of the orphanage, as he had ordered to call him one of the rare times when he went to talk to him - and his wife welcomed a new orphan or when one of them was adopted by a family and they went away.  
When there were special guests or contingency as influences and other ailments, and children above standing for special attention and care.

In eight years of life he was sick once, and was so badly shaken by chills, with blurred vision and throat on fire because of cough who had sworn never again to commit a similar error; really convinced it was only because of him, as if the fever was something that you choose to have and which in his case was only a source of annoyance for others.  
Always wanted to make happy the only people who could be considered the parents - or at least not be an obstacle to their happiness - and when he realized that the best way to do that was to breathe slowly so as not to be heard had also learned how not to be intrigued by sounds that something different that sometimes happened.

That morning did not react in any way belonging to strike a quick glance out the window when he heard the excited voices of his parents and of other men he did not know, however, immediately ascertaining that the bars prevented him any visual input.  
He saw only the feet of adults and those of a small child, certainly smaller than him, who lingered in the doorway. He is saddened that someone was orphaned at that age, refusing to read the book he had been studying for a few days and leaving himself instead slid to the ground and bringing his knees to his chest before wrapping them in his arms.

He realized that it was a form of solidarity nonsense, which remained staring into space certainly would not have helped that child, but also he could not do anything else.

That day no one came to inform him of the newcomer, and even when someone opened the door to deliver the tray lunch and dinner never came even enough to see his face.

But it was normal, just his life as he could remember, and he was so used that as far as he could easily understand the books he had found there to gather dust - old themes of literature or mathematics – now he could no longer understand that the clamp that clung to his chest was a deep-rooted loneliness.

The days passed without that Sora received no news, and soon he surrendered to the fact that no one would think to present to him the new brother.

He was aware that the only child that he could really consider in that way was Tsukasa, the son of his father and the new wife of him, but in front of his eyes all the other children who lived in that house were his brothers.

He had no reason to think so because they merely follow the order of the adults not to go near the cellar and pretend that he did not exist, and yet he still considered them important.

Had been a week and no one had ever fallen to him, even Tsukasa who also sought whenever he could go talk to him, and now his thoughts rather than the new baby had returned to focus on trying to read even when the sun was setting.

He had never been allowed to turn on the light, in fact he doubted that the current arrived there in the cellar, but the darkness made him too scared to accept it without trying to oppose.

He had a vague and frightening impression that if he continued to live like this, getting used to the utter loneliness of not being considered alive by anyone, he would also come to love the darkness in which, while holding the arm in front of him, he could not see the his hand like all the others.

But now the idea still terrified him, and tried to fight it by setting the sunlight so hard to do burn eyes and obstinate to read even after sunset.

He was trying to decipher the character of a small medical book when, without warning, opened a crack in the door of the cellar.

Surprised rose early lead, expecting to see his brother.

- Tsukasa? - Called to him in a low voice, fearing that their father could hear them.

When he received no answer he stood up, making a little 'hard work after sitting for most of the day, and he was speechless with surprise by noting that on the doorstep was a child he had never seen before.

Stared back equally amazed at his green eyes, making only time to understand that he had to be the newcomer to first try a bike for immediate empathy to perceive the solitude of his gaze.

He tried to say something to him - knowing that he would have to go away but, being ashamed of his selfishness, eager to keep him there for not staying still alone in the dark - but he was silenced by the voice is much stronger than his suddenly startled him .

- Miharu-kun, I told you not to go near the cellar!

Sora glanced hesitantly to his father, just appeared in the doorway behind the child, but the man ignored him completely instead of grabbing a coat of Miharu and pushing forward to follow him out of there.

However, before leaving, when he had already sent Miharu away, he turned to run him through with a look so full of hatred that Sora backed away.

He stood rigid when the man slammed the door behind him and he could hear his footsteps away along with those lighter of the child, Miharu if he understood his name, surprised at the discovery that he could still be hurt by the hatred of his father who was used since he was born.

_You'd never been born, your mother is dead because of you!_

_If you had never existed, we would all be much happier!_

_Are you a murderess, a god of death._

Sora instinctively put his hands over his ears to ward off his voice, the words that during those years he continued to throw on him along with an icy contempt and a deep grudge, then let himself slip once again to the ground .

He put his legs to his chest in the pose that he considered routine - one that took up less space and gave him the impression of giving less hassle as possible - and squeezed them in his arms, resting his forehead on his knees.

It was so long that he no longer felt a need of this kind, and yet now he really wanted to cry.


	2. first meeting

**Second chapter of my first long fiction *_* I'm very happy for this, I hope you will enjoy the chapter**

* * *

Had now been a week since the man, a family friend who Miharu had never seen, had followed him into the house; telling him that he had to stay there only as long as his grandmother would recover from his illness and had been in able to take care of him.

He did not even mention his parents, and Miharu was happy about that.

He had a vague consciousness that he should be sad to know that they would not come back anymore, but he still felt too confused to do it.

He knew they were dead but he could not remember the last time that he saw them, as well as almost all of his childhood memories were hidden behind a blanket of fog that made it hard to feel an intense emotion such as pain.

Instead there was the void next to apathy that had led him to accept passively moving in that orphanage, nodding to the constant reassurance that his grandmother once healed would immediately adopted him.

He turned again in the bed, lost in his thoughts, until they came to focus on the child in the cellar that he had seen a few hours earlier.

During that week he had often noticed that the lady of the orphanage - who insisted with him and other children to be called "Mom" - came into the room carrying a tray of food for both lunch and dinner, but when he had asked for an explanation she had merely ordered not to ask anything about it ever again and never to enter the basement.

At least the first few days Miharu had tried to obey, resisting the curiosity, but that night he could not restrain himself over and had peeked through the door. In fact, he had never established to think about what could be there, but when he found himself in front of a child about his age he had been too stunned to do anything other than fixed him.

He had not had time to ask him what he was doing there, or at least if he had not cold in that place when at night he shivered even under the covers, which had appeared the lord of the orphanage - which, unlike the wife did not seem to keep to be called "daddy", but also asked all of them to do so - and took him away.

The man also repeated to him not to come anymore, to pretend that the child he had seen simply did not exist, but if from the beginning he had felt dissatisfied for this idea Miharu now found it impossible to please him.

Moved by an intense feeling that he did not remember ever having tried - but with the vacuum were the memories of his past, he had to admit that he not had a great yardstick for comparison - got out of bed, shivering just touch the floor with his barefoot, and not caring that it was the night came silently out of the room to go to him.

He had been afraid that he would find the cellar door barred, and he was relieved when this instead opened easily. Closed it carefully behind him to make sure not to be discovered, then descend the few steps carefully; holding the railing to keep from falling.

- Who is ...?

- I am Miharu.

He found his answer rather silly, knowing that the child certainly could not know his name, but the voice with which he had asked that question had seemed so sad - clearly hoarse from crying - that he felt the urge to talk to him without think.

He tried to look for a switch to turn on the light, afraid of the dark dense environment, but also touching the wall he found nothing.

- There is no light - Sora said, sensing by his movements what he was doing.

He said no more, still too surprised that the child had gone to see him again, and despite the darkness his eyes were so addicted that he could just make out his silhouette. He hesitated before hold out his hand to guide Miharu towards him, intimidated by having a sudden contact with a person who had never seen before, and eventually ventured at least talk to him.

- Where are you now there is a box, you can sit there - he said.

- You do not have a bed? - Asked Miharu.

- No - said Sora, ashamed even knowing that there wasn't his fault.

But then he remembered that in the end it was so, because if he had not been what he was his father would not let him sleep on the floor, and had wanted to cry again.

It was the second time he saw the child, and the second he felt an impulse like that even though he does not usually ever thought about this, and felt torn between an instinctive need to escape and a incomprehensible attraction.

He thought that this child, Miharu, could understand him when he was struggling to understand each other, and it was an idea that bewildered him.

- You should go - he said, rediscovering difficult to pronounce those words.

Miharu, however, did not seem to give weight, instead sitting obediently on the box that had been pointed out. Now that he was getting used to the darkness he could see Sora's figure better, recognizing it as he had seen hours earlier in their first fleeting encounter, and went back to talk as if he had not heard his statement.

- How old are you?

Sora did not understand why he had asked that question first of all, when usually it was more normal to ask the name or identity, but since he never knew how to deal with such questions he was relieved.

- 8 - answered quietly.

- You do not look older than me by two years - Miharu looked puzzled. - In fact, I thought you were smaller.

Sora cashed that comment without getting upset, aware of being very low and frail for his age.

He had read in a book that humans need light and open spaces to grow properly, so beyond a slight bitterness he did not find it strange if its development was so late considering he was always locked in that room.

Miharu did not insist further, perhaps sensing of it made him uncomfortable, and began to look around.

- You're grounded? - Point-blank asked instead.

Sora did not know what to say, thinking that in fact it was true, but not knowing how to explain a punishment that was started from the day he was born.

- How long you been here? - Miharu insisted.

- My father is the director.

Sora was aware that his answer was ambiguous, which had deliberately misunderstood his question about the time he had spent in the cellar turning it as if Miharu asked him general of his life in the orphanage..

He felt guilty even then, realizing that just made him understand that he is not an orphan like him, but leaving a little 'lost the other looked at him with interest.

- I understood that only Tsukasa-kun was his son - admitted in a tone of apology.

Sora once again did not know what to say, finding it too painful to admit even to himself that for his father was certainly so. Tsukasa was his son, his child, he was the only mistake he had killed his own mother.

Miharu distinctly saw his gaze suddenly become suffered, and hurried down from the box to go near Sora. Once he was close to him do not really know what to do, unable to remember if before the death of his parents he had been able to comfort someone, but finally shook Sora's hand impulsively.

Remained even more amazed at him for his gesture, but neither of them mentioned to reject it.

For a few moments they remained just that, with Miharu who his her hand to Sora and shuddered to feel this cold, then he slowly - not dissolve on contact - instead of returning to the place of first sat down at his side.

- I am Miharu - said again. - What is your name?

Sora knew that question would come sooner or later, and could not help but respond.

- I do not know - he said softly. - Should be Sora, but Sora was the name that my mother wanted to give her daughter so I can not be me. I'm not Sora, but I do not know who else I am.

- You are you - Miharu replied.

He had spoken of instinct, confused by his speech but finding just normal at least argue on that point. He considered it so obvious that he found absurd to have to stay to explain it.

- A name is just a name - insisted. - You're still you, if you can call Sora then we shall find another.

Sora's eyes widened, surprised by his determined response, and without giving him time to say anything Miharu began to list all the names that he knew.

- Kento? - Said thoughtfully. - Reichiro, Hinata, Ran, Mizuko, Tsukasa ... no, Tsukasa is your brother. Yoru ... Yu ... Yoite?

Sora had been to listen to him in silence, feeling that it was important for Miharu what he was doing and so not daring to disappoint him, but he still hadn't the slightest confidence that it would be so easy to give a name to someone like him referred to in was barely acknowledged his existence.

However, although with this bitter certainty, involuntarily gasped when Miharu uttered that last name. He thought to its meaning: the evening wind that he had always found it comforting to hear when he could not sleep, and inadvertently found himself thinking it would be nice be called that.

He did not say, merely look hesitant at Miharu, but he stopped talking

- Do you like Yoite? – asked.

Sora instinctively wanted to nod, but he was still too uncertain and fearful that he did not deserve, to begin with, all the attention that Miharu was giving him.

He wanted this, he had always wanted this by his family, but now he was bewildered that to do so was a child that he had never seen before.

Yet Miharu was looking at him, patiently waiting for a response, that small child with tousled hair and beautiful green eyes were looking at him with sincere interest

- Yes ... - he said softly. - I like that.

Miharu smiled with satisfaction.

- So from now on I will call you so - he said solemnly. - If you can not be Sora then you will be Yoite.

He did not feel at all safe, just upset and discouraged, but still found himself nodding shyly. He did not believe that it was all so simple, but at least for that moment he allowed himself to not think about it; just focus on the Miharu's smile.

* * *

_Note: At the end of the list of names Miharu quotes Yoru and Yu. Respective names mean "night" and "evening" and he then made an easy connection of mind in coming to think Yoite "the evening wind."_


	3. clashes

**I've always hated the Yoite's parents ever since I read the manga, of course, but writing about them in this fiction I began to hate them even more than before...**

**Thank you very much all those who have reviewed, I hope that fiction can continue to like you considering it will be quite long ^^**

* * *

He was never able to really consider himself as Sora, especially because his father had always told him bluntly that he hadn't the right to carry that name, so he not found that difficult to start thinking of himself as Yoite.

The first few days he had felt in difficulty, a little embarrassed when Miharu opened the cellar door and greeted calling him so, but after a week he had begun to slide down the name on the tongue as if it were a candy, pronouncing it softly several times, as if trying to make it his.

He liked especially when was Miharu at call him, could not help but notice that there was some feeling in his voice. After 8 years Yoite was resigned to not having a real contact with anyone, no more than the occasional visits of Tsukasa and strangers who crossed the street than a few times a month when his parents allowed him to quit.

As he did suffer, as the most sincere of himself painfully felt overwhelmed by the refusal of the world, had come to accept it.

Instead, breaking the certainty that he had built, from their first meeting Miharu had continued stubbornly and without showing the slightest hesitation to go to him every night for several hours.

Far from having fear of being discovered, he had indeed appeared increasingly impatient about this secrecy, so Yoite was not surprised much when that day saw him open the door in the early afternoon.

- Miharu, if they find you…

- There is no one at home, let's go play outside - he said, interrupting his warning murmur.

Miharu saw the look of him being hesitant, clearly torn between the desire to go out in the garden after weeks and reluctance to disobey his father, but he was determined not to allow him to refuse.

Miharu was surprised to realize how Yoite was able to move him, as his mere presence had been able to tear apathy into which he had fallen after the death of his parents, and even though it was a feeling that he still did not understand was instinctively eager to cultivate it.

- Let's go - he repeated firmly.

After a few more moments of uncertainty Yoite slowly nodded, and smiled despite concerns when Miharu lit up his face for that answer.

Yoite accepted the hand that he held out at him, and followed him out of the cellar in silence. Once out involuntarily closed his eyes when the sun's rays too intense hurts his view, accustomed to the darkness rather than the light, but fearing that Miharu would be worried tried to open them soon.

As he had expected Miharu was watching him anxiously, so smiled again to reassure him.

- I'm fine - he said.

- You look pale - Miharu protested.

This Yoite could not challenge it, having rarely seen himself in the mirror but still be able to easily imagine that his way of life certainly did not help to have a particularly healthy appearance, so chose to divert the whole speech.

- What do you do? - He asked.

Miharu was suspicious for a few moments, then he let himself be overcome by the desire to play with him.

- Pull the ball - answered promptly.

Yoite initially thought that Miharu meant the ball - the white, dirty ball that peeking through the window of the cellar he had seen often kicked from the other children in the garden - but after having run away Miharu returned holding a baseball glove.

- I played it once with Tsukasa-kun - he explained.

- Me too ... - Yoite said, lowering a little 'voice.

He didn't understand him first if the memory caused him bitterness or happiness, of course he was always grateful for the attention that Tsukasa give him but also that in this way the cold was even more pungent when his brother was forced to leave.

Driven by similar thoughts Yoite looked the youngest child with concern: Miharu that could go and see him only at night, Miharu that would soon started to attend school and therefore probably no longer had time for him. Suddenly he wanted to cry, and for distraction he grabbed the glove.

- Start you throwing the ball - he said.

Miharu had noticed that his expression had become more hesitant and painful, but after a short hesitation he decided not to ask him about it, not for this moment.

* * *

- Aren't you bored to play with me?

Yoite reached out to grab the latest lauching, then looked at him with sincere amazement for his sudden question.

He did not understand how Miharu could consider himself boring when his company made him so happy that it's almost scary. Uncomfortable at times for that feeling completely new that he was not sure how to manage, let alone to deserve, but inwardly always happy for this disclosed affection that Miharu showed him.

- Of course not - he said. - How can you think that?

Miharu looked a bit sulky, pointing his look to the ground.

- Even though we're the same age Tsukasa-kun is much better for me to launch ... - admitted in a low voice.

He glanced sideways at Yoite to see his reaction, blushing a bit 'to see him smile. Miharu had feared that he would have nodded, admitting that he had enjoyed with Tsukasa much more, instead he was looking at him with gentle expression.

- It is not important, it's good enough so - assured him.

Miharu he was not particularly convinced, as he had already learned how Yoite was a person naturally inclined to treat with care the other, to the point that if he was going to hurt someone was the first to feel sick, but eventually ruled that even if it was a lie is right to believe in it.

- If we start to play often, I definitely get better - he said.

Yoite hesitated, knowing he could not promise anything like that because if was difficult that his father left him out of the house was just unthinkable that he allow him to play in the garden with others children.

But Miharu was staring at him expectantly, and Yoite did not have the courage to explain clearly, as he had never done before, which did not exist for him a life out of the cellar.

He hesitated at long, but regretted that he had hoped for something that would attract attention of Miharu from his answer when the unexpectedly that he had called materialized in the figures of his parents.

Yoite saw his father's eyes widen in surprise and immediately after become dark, clearly furious, and did not react when he grabbed firmly Miharu by a hand.

- Miharu-kun, you said you'd stayed in bed because you were not feeling well! - snapped accusingly.

He tried to free himself from his grasp, and when he realized that it was useless stared at him with an plaintive expression that Yoite suspected was entirely calculated. However, it had no effect on the man, which remained dark and angry as before.

Even the woman in the meantime had approached, passing near at Yoite as if she don't saw him, and he knelt in front of Miharu to speak in a more polite but categorical.

- Miharu-kun, you mustn't play with that child - told him sternly. - You have to think that it is as if he did not exist, you must not speak to him and you do not have to have anything to do with him.

The expression of Miharu became upset, confused by those words for him senseless, and turned his head to look at Yoite. He did not say anything, still standing in the same spot where until recently they were playing, but gave him a rueful smile and full of kindness that prompted Miharu to rebel.

- I will not! - Exclaimed. - I like to be with Yoite, and since he lives here you can not stop me.

The first reaction to her was to remain perplexed before the name that Miharu had used to refer to Sora, but her husband did not lose even a moment on the issue. Instead he returned to him with hardness, irritated by the whole situation.

- He doesn't live here - he retorted. - As we've already said you must think that it is as if he did not exist.

- But he exists, of course Yoite exist! - Miharu protested, raising his voice.

He was not understanding almost nothing of that argument, finding simply absurd to deny the presence of a person that clearly exists, and over the shock he also felt a sense of anger that he could not remember ever having felt before.

Yoite had smiled at him as someone who had already resigned to return to solitude, but does not want to complain for not bothering anyone, and even though it was a thought still very vague - too complex for him to decipher at his age - Miharu found intolerable that Yoite prefer to punish himself instead of those who made him feel ill.

- In my room there is an empty bed, I want that Yoite sleep with me - he said with the more determined tone than had ever used. - He can't live in the cellar, it is not right!

She stiffened to hear him speak so, amazed that Miharu could take a position in that way - convinced that like all other children, including Tsukasa who also did not do it willingly, he simply would follow orders - and was able to deal with them, even if he was so little.

She exchanged a hesitantly glances with her husband, and this was enough because she realize that he was following her own line of thought. That if Miharu went around to complain about the situation of Sora they would have many problems for the way as the child was growing; never enrolled in school even if he had already eight years.

Even hating Sora they were also realistic enough to know that a stranger could not understand that this kid didn't deserve anything, that he should just disappear for the good of all.

For this idea the man looked Miharu with resentment, hard enough to startle Yoite.

- I'm sorry, it's just my fault - he intervened, speaking for the first time.

He acted instinctively for fear that his father blamed Miharu, but backed off when the man turned to look at him. Although accustomed to his hatred Yoite freezed under the weight of that feeling, touching for the first time the terrifying certainty that his father would have been able to try to kill him without a second thought.

He did not know what else to say, now finding it very difficult to talk, but he spoke first.

- You can move to sleep in the room with Miharu-kun - said through gritted teeth. - But don't you dare to introduce you at my table for meals!

He said nothing more before reaching the house with a sudden snap, slamming the door firmly after his wife joined him.

Yoite stared at the spot where he had disappeared without a word, still too shocked and incredulous for accept those words as true. Then he winced when Miharu ran around with a openly happy expression.

- Did you hear? We can be together! - Exclaimed.

Yoite smiled, genuinely happy for the happiness of him and for not spoil the moment.

Inwardly, however, he could not prove simple joy about the huge concession that his father had just given at him. Constrained by the pain of knowing how much his parents hated him and for the dizziness of that change too sudden.

Suddenly he no longer felt able to stand, and slid to the ground without making a sound.

- Yoite, you feel bad? - Miharu asked apprehensively, kneeling at his side.

- ... I'm fine - he said.

Then repeated it again to convince him, smiling, and looking at the Miharu's expression so worried he couldn't stay focused only on himself. He tried to swallow the pain and confusion, to think that from now he might be able to live an almost normal life. To think about Miharu, without wondering whether it was right that he help him in that way.


	4. chance for a new life

**In the fourth chapter also comes Tsukasa. I like him a lot as a character, I think it was a really good brother to Yoite although he is not really able to help him.**

**I always thank all those who read and comment this fiction ^^**

* * *

Tsukasa had often thought about as he wanted to live with his brother in the normal way, less confused and more resigned with the passage of time.

Still did not understand at all why their father hated Sora and forced him to live in the basement, away from everyone and estranged from the world, but at least he realized that things probably would not have ever changed.

No matter how this could make him sad or how it was unfair - even though he was only six years he felt that there was nothing to justify, his parents could never convince him otherwise - simply was what it was, without any possible way to escape.

For this conviction when that day Tsukasa returned home from the park and saw Sora in the garden with the new baby just arrived at the orphanage, was initially too shocked to react.

He was just staring at them with wide eyes, knowing that at that time his mother was certainly at home and finding it impossible that his brother had been allowed to go outside.

- ... Sora? - called him hesitant.

Yoite did not turn around soon. He recognized the voice of his brother, but after what had happened with his father was deeply reluctant to be called that way. But he hadn't the courage to ask at Tsukasa to call him Yoite as Miharu did, so at the end looked him.

- Welcome back - he said simply.

- Thanks - Tsukasa said. Had replied so out of sheer habit, but then shook his head saying that it was not the time to have a normal conversation. - Sora, daddy knows that you ...

Hesitated to finish the sentence, finding himself uncomfortable having to ask at his brother if their father knew he was out of the cellar, but before he could begin to feel distressed Miharu intervened.

- Yoite sleep in the room with me from now on - said in a tone of pride and, Tsukasa had had a suspicion about it, even slightly possessive.

Miharu was looking at him as if to challenge him to a protest, perhaps reply that Yoite was supposed to stay in his room because they were brothers, and Tsukasa returned his look a bit 'disbelief.

He was not understanding anything of that situation, beyond the attitude of Miharu and why he had turned to Sora calling him by that name, he could not even decide if that kid was talking seriously or if he was kidding.

Tsukasa looked hesitant at his brother, and his expression gentle and slightly insecure at least convinced him that Miharu had told the truth.

- Really you can sleep in the room with him? - asked, wanting to hear him say it anyway.

Yoite nodded, and Tsukasa for this moment decided to settle for this. He walked over to his brother and embraced him with transport, feeling just happy and relieved to know him out of that cellar although the reason was quite dark.

- That's great... - he whispered. - Really Sora, I ...

- His name is Yoite - intervened Miharu with tone a bit ' abrupt.

Tsukasa broke away from his brother, who had timidly returned his grip, and looked again at the other child. Until then he had never paid too much attention at him, by now prejudiced and convinced that Sora would have been discriminated and ignored by each new guest of that place.

Now, however, Tsukasa carefully watched Miharu, not understanding how he managed to get that Sora could sleep with him; but extremely grateful for that. Even a little lower, thinking that compared to him he had never been able to do anything for his brother, but immediately ignored such thoughts.

- Why Yoite? - he asked, genuinely curious.

- Why is his name - insisted Miharu.

Tsukasa realized that the child would not have added anything more, so glanced a questioning look at Sora. He looked uncomfortable for a moment, not knowing how to explain, but in the end he spoke in a clear voice.

- Sora has never been my name... and when I told this to him, Miharu has decided to find another one ... mine.

Tsukasa looked at him in amazement, thinking as first reaction that was childish behavior for a person terribly clever as his brother. But then reluctantly he admitted that was right to say that Sora was never really his name, not with their father who never failed to repeat that only his daughter ever born should be called so, and he felt guilty for never having understood that his brother was really sad about that.

- Yoite is a beautiful name - said aloud. - Even I will call you so!

Tsukasa reflection smiled when he saw him do the same, having always known his brother as a smiling person but now for the first time recognizing the difference between a smile of gentle courtesy and a real one. He loved that smile.

* * *

Although he had already understood that his father had been sincere, really angry and so sincere, Yoite began to seriously believe that he could sleep in that room only when Miharu accompanied him to see it and no one intervened to stop them.

In addition, he found his mother while she was arranging the second bed never used, and in spite of himself he felt his heart begin to beat harder at the thought that from that day this would be his.

- If you want to sleep next to the window I can give thee my bed - Miharu proposed.

- No, this one is fine - quiet Yoite said.

The woman was startled to hear their voices, not having noticed their arrival, and immediately turned to shoot a reproachful look in Miharu.

- Miharu-kun, you do not have to appear behind people in this way! - protested.

Not even once laid eyes on Yoite, not when she finished changing the sheets and even in passing next to him to leave the room, but he did not have time to feel sorry - or upset, yet he could not understand what was the predominant emotion in front of the thought of being considered invisible - that Miharu firmly shook his hand and led him to the window.

- There is a beautiful view - he said, - you really do not want the bed near here?

- No, it doesn't matter - Yoite answered yet. - I like the other bed.

Honestly, he did not even know how anyone could express a preference on something he had always wanted so much as to consider it utopian, but he was also aware that this is not true for a normal person like Miharu.

Consider himself strange gave him a unpleasant sensation, thinking that in all probability if he continued to live in the cellar for years he would eventually found sleeping on the floor too obvious to be able to adapt to beds or sofas.

- The other is good ... - repeated, feeling suddenly scared for the idea that, perhaps, it was already too late and that night he wouldn't sleep.

Miharu was a little surprised when Yoite suddenly shook his hand firmly, but didn't ask him any questions. He noted however his anxious expression, and instinctively speak for calm him down.

- Tonight we can sleep together? - proposed. - Well... I still find hard to sleep alone.

It was not true, but he realized that if he did not place so his request Yoite would not but agreed.

Even in that way he hesitated, obviously relieved and happy but uncertain about an intimacy like that, and when he finally nodded Miharu smiled with satisfaction.

- The school will only start in a week, until then we will also do later in the evening - said, not thinking about the fact that he is still used to fall asleep shortly after dinner.

Yoite stiffened imperceptibly to hear that statement, not knowing how to explain that he had never gone to school and certainly he would not go in the future. Although his father had allowed him to leave the cellar, was just a madness to think that he would have permitted him to study outside the home, which in general allow him to go out and have a normal life.

But Miharu was looking at him with an confident expression, clearly pleased at the prospect of going to school together, and Yoite could not disappoint him. Not for that day, where he only wished to think that, although still limited and full of problems, his life thanks to Miharu had also just taken a new direction that still seemed almost impossible.

* * *

- ... But he is really here?

- I said yes, I saw him.

- Come on, you're just a liar!

- But it's true, now he is sleeping with Miharu-kun!

Tsukasa had found it odd that this group of children was conferring on the stairs instead of going to breakfast, and when he caught glimpses of their speech became totally suspicious.

Approached them with determination, conscious to exercise a certain fear at the guests of the orphanage as the only natural son of the director.

- What are you talking about? - asked without preamble.

The three children exchanged glances hesitant, but Tsukasa realized that they weren't ashamed of being discovered as genuinely nervous for the object of their discussion. The smallest about 4 years old came up to him with anxiously, tugging the sleeve of his sweatshirt.

- Dad... yes, your father... well, he always told us that the child who lives in the basement is bad and we have to pretend that he didn't exist - said in a whining tone. - But today I saw him sleeping with Miharu-kun above! He's hurting Miharu-kun?

Tsukasa was too stunned to react quickly, not understanding even if these words were more sad or irritants. He could even laugh about it, considering them in the end only ridiculous, but realized that these children were really scared and forced himself to keep a straight face.

He didn't think about them but about Sora - or Yoite, as he was getting used to call him - knowing that his brother would have been deeply saddened to discover that the other children at the orphanage were nervous because of him.

- His name is Yoite-kun and he is definitely not a bad person - said firmly. - Now he will sleep with Miharu-kun... you must learn to regard him as anyone else, okay? But now it is still very early, go outside to play without disturbing them until breakfast time.

It was obvious that they were not at all convinced by his explanation, probably even more confused and anxious than before, but immediately agreed to his request to go out in the garden.

Once just Tsukasa sighed, feeling relieved that the day before Yoite practically never left the room. The other children were perplexed to see Miharu down to dinner just to get a tray with two plates and go back upstairs, while his father had become completely livid about this, but at least they had not asked questions.

- Everything will be fine - he muttered, trying to encourage himself.

At the beginning are all a bit 'surprised to see Sora, no Yoite... but then they get used to him.

Tsukasa could not find this idea very convincing, especially when he thought about the older kids who were literally grew up with the conviction that they must despise and ignore the strange child in the cellar.

But he also smiled when, peering into the room of Miharu, saw him and Yoite sleeping in the same bed; heads sticking out from under the covers and the black hair of both that were mixed together in the pillow.

He was also quite surprised that his brother had given such an intimacy to a child who knew only a few weeks, but he perceived that he and Miharu there was a bond strong and irrational; as two magnets hopelessly attracted to each other.

For a moment he touched the idea of waking them, thinking that if his mother or his father had seen them sleep in that way they could get angry with Yoite, but in the end could not disturb his brother to see him sleep so soundly. Tsukasa had always worried that he slept little and poorly in the cellar, and in front of his relaxed face didn't even have the courage to enter the room. He slowly closed the door behind him, careful not to make noise, and decided to stay there for the rest of the morning near to prevent anyone else from doing so.


	5. a wish

**These early chapters are introductory enough, I think the story will start to follow a tighter plot starting from seventh.**

** I hope, however, that these may pleasure, as always thanks to those who read and commented ^^**

* * *

if someone had said this to him, Miharu could not say why he felt so instinctively attracted to Yoite.

He had never been a particularly sociable child, still able to make friends but not a person who seeks the company of others voluntarily, but from the first moment Miharu had felt the compelling desire not to be separated from him.

Beyond the surprise of finding a child hidden in the cellar, fact that even now he could not clarify as Yoite himself refused to explain why he was there, had been enough to watch his clear, kind blue eyes to perceive all his loneliness.

Before meeting Yoite, Miharu had not even realized to know the loneliness, but the empathy that he felt was so compelling as to make impossible to ignore it.

- Miharu-kun, you like this folder ?

He replied with a reproach look to the apparently amiable question that the lady of the orphanage asked to him, as he was determined to continue to consider she.

- I want the same one that you will buy also for Yoite - answered yet.

He said the same thing for the notebooks, the box, the lunch box and crayons; undaunted, despite every time the woman would reply more bluntly that Sora would not have gone to school with him. Now she completely abandoned the previous calm expression, looking at him with open disapproval and abruptly putting the folder in its place.

Miharu didn't intimidate from her behavior, since they were days that he argued furiously this history with both Yoite's parents.

When Miharu had discovered that Yoite had never gone to school, and that his father was not willing to enroll him not even this year even, he was initially appalled. After, he had occurred a pure spirit of rebellion.

- I'm not going to school without Yoite! - stated with categorical tone, raising his voice.

Tsukasa had been anxiously at his side since his mother had brought them to the store, the two of them and another child of the same age which would in turn started the elementary cycle next week, and after this statement could not help without looking at him breathless.

He understood his feelings, that was easy, but he was also intimidated by the mere prospect of facing his parents in that way.

- I'm not going - Miharu repeated, stubborn.

- You're going - she said dryly.

However Tsukasa saw on her mother's face a shadow of hesitation, and recognized her act of biting the lip when she was nervous about something. He did not think that Miharu had noticed it, but he didn't bother about the order and stood by the door with his arms crossed over his chest.

- Mom ... - Tsukasa called hesitantly.

- Tsukasa, Akito-kun, let's go home! - she said.

The other boy immediately obeyed, and even Tsukasa after a brief hesitation nodded. He was frankly scared of what would happen once they were back: he was sure that his mother would conclude definitively the question asking her husband to speak clearly to Miharu, and he no longer had the slightest hope that the child could have the better.

He felt horribly coward for that, but as soon as they got home he hastened to take his baseball bat to train against the wall, not daring look at his mother and Miharu who entered without him.

* * *

- So Miharu-kun, mom told me that you're being disobedient.

- She isn't my mother.

He replied without thinking, moved more by nervousness about the whole situation that from that specific particular. Honestly the memories of his real mother was so nebulous that he didn't feel uncomfortable to call another woman with that title, especially the person that was growing up him.

But both she and the man who had just spoken were trying to convince him that it was right to keep Yoite locked up in the house, and this led him instinctively to take a hostile attitude towards them.

Miharu looked at them stiffen for his answer, and he didn't mind.

The man briefly hesitated, then he preferred not to discuss that point. Instead he cleared his throat, going back to talk to him calmly but categorical.

- Miharu-kun, Sora will not come to school with you - he said.

- So I don't go.

- You can and should go.

- Even Yoite can! - Miharu said, frustrated. - He has 8 years but has yet to begin first grade, isn't right!

- Unjust is only that because of your whims he sleep in my house like everyone else! - the man snapped before he could stop himself.

When he realized he had gone too far he took a deep breath, nodding briefly to his wife that had laid a hand on his arm with anxiety.

Both were more nervous than they ever wanted to admit, knowing that if they failed to persuade Miharu there home he could complain to school unleashing an uncontrollable reaction.

The truth was that Sora would never have been born, were certain of this, but the objective reality was that actually they had at home a child who had never started compulsory education.

The man tried to smile at Miharu to calm him.

- Listen Miharu-kun, would you like if after your first day of school we make you a gift? - proposed in the captivating tone.

- I want Yoite with me.

Since Mihary could remember was the first time that he insisted so much to get something, but he was also moved by a firmness unshaken. It was a feeling that drew to a mysterious force that he still did not understand at all, but at least Miharu knew that had enough to think at Yoite for straighten his back and say to himself that he could never give up.

Miharu realized that victory was his when he saw the look of Yoite's father, his face darkened. For a few moments came on them a tense silence, broken only by the muffled voices of children playing in the garden, then the man suddenly raised his eyes. He was hostile and full of anger, and Miharu struggled a little not to be afraid.

But he merely said curtly to him to go and call Sora.

- This isn't ...

Miharu did instinctively to explain again that he was called Yoite, but at the last he stopped, deciding that it would not be a wise move to make another request. Rather nodded and hurried up the stairs, feeling just happy with what he had achieved.

- Honey, we really...

- Do you have another idea? - Snapped the man harshly, interrupting the uncertain demand for her.

The wife stiffened but did not answer; much aware that no, there was no alternative if Miharu was so determined to complain about the Sora's situation, how certain that would not be appropriate on her part to further annoy her husband.

They stood still in silence without looking at each other, until they heard the Miharu's steps down the stairs followed by those of another person.

Yoite entered into the kitchen following Miharu, divided by a thin anxiety and an expectation that he never knew curb on the rare times when his parents wanted to talk to him. He shot a quick glance to his father, immediately losing any vague hope in front of his expression. He seemed so angry that impulsively Yoite stood before Miharu, fearing for his safety, and was relieved when the man, however, asked his wife to take him out.

- I want to stay here - Miharu immediately protested.

- Go on, I'll join you later - Yoite said, anticipating any replies of his parents.

Inwardly he felt uncomfortable at the prospect of being alone with his father and then terribly guilty for this feeling, but he still managed to smile quietly to the youngest child. Miharu did not feel particularly persuaded by his smile, recognizing it as sweet as ever but even with that tinge of sadness that he had learned to hate, but he sensed that the stakes were too high to mess it up right now with a whim.

So nodded, allowing her to lead him in the garden.

Yoite followed him with intense eyes, in silence, and winced when his father suddenly grabbed him by the arm and pulled him abruptly.

- I guess Miharu-kun already said you everything - he said through clenched teeth.

Yoite slowly shook his head in denial. When Miharu had entered in their room to call him had clearly excited about something, but he refused to explain the reason. Realizing that he wanted to surprise him Yoite had not insisted, but now he regretted this decision before his father's malevolent look.

- I'm sorry - said, not thinking even for a moment that it was not his fault that no one had said him anything.

The man became angry, convinced that he was lying to taunt him, then tried to take a deep breath to calm down just enough to speak clearly and conclude immediately that conversation. He hated having to interact with Sora more than anything else, not confident about his ability to contain the hatred within the safe limit that would prevent him from making a gesture really desired but too reckless as hitting Sora for finally get rid of his presence.

- Tomorrow my wife will take you to school to find out if you can skip classes or need to start from the first - informed him dryly.

Yoite's eyes widened, as a first reaction so shocked that he understood only vaguely the real significance of those words. He could not say anything, he was barely able to think something coherent, and irritated by his silence the man tugged him again.

- At school you have to say that in these two years you have been sick - ordered him menacingly. - Only if it's a teacher to ask, if it will be someone else to talk you will not have to say a word. Do you understand? Answer me!

-...Yes

He sighed more deeply, still irritated by his murmur but too impatient to expect something more.

- You will not tell anyone where you live and who you are - continued. - You're going to school only to study, you will not even try to talk to others. I assure you that I would come to know if you were close to someone and in such case you would pay dearly for it.

He continued to shake his arm strong enough to hurt him, but Yoite nodded without disclose the minimum pain. His father stared at him for a few seconds, as if trying in vain to see any trace of rebellion in his eyes, then let him go with an abrupt gesture and left the room without another word.

Once alone Yoite mechanically brought a hand on his arm, where there was throbbing painfully, and stood staring into space.

Despite his father's words had entered into him so intensely to shake him, he felt still stunned; unable to believe that the man had really given him permission to go to school. That, beyond the threats and hatred, had just fulfilled his greatest desire.

For a moment Yoite was attacked by panic and feared that it was all a joke, everything a huge and cruel joke from the beginning. That he would not go to school and would not even be able to continue to sleep in that room, that Miharu has agreed with his parents to deceive him, and as soon as they would have enough fun would send him back in cellar

But then Yoite recovered the minimum of lucidity to hate himself because of that thought, feeling guilty for his parents - regardless of how they treated him, only because he knew it was wrong to speak ill of them - but especially for the only person who made him feel real.

Miharu was someone that he would always trusted, a certainty that Yoite felt deeply ashamed of having doubted.

He don't found the courage to go to him; but beyond the blame to himself, the painful arm and confusion Yoite felt a clear comfort at the mere thought that at any moment Miharu would be there for him.


	6. test

**I expected that this fiction will greatly exceed the ten chapters, but now I can not say with certainty the final length already. Anyway I hope will be of interest to the end, as always many thanks to all who read and comment ^^**

* * *

- Don't move and don't look around!

Yoite reacted to sharp rebuke of his mother stiffening in the chair, stopping obediently to study his surroundings. Realizing that Miharu was next to protest moved immediately to prevent him, crossing his eyes to make him understand that he should not say anything.

Miharu looked sullen, by now instinctively decided to replicate against anyone in the family to tell him something bad, but he agreed to his request not to make controversy. However, he could not remain silent.

- The tests were difficult? - asked, really curious.

Yoite hesitated, not knowing whether his mother would definitely angry to hear him speak, but in the end didn't want to ignore Miharu.

- No, I think not - answered truthfully.

She made a noise that sounded like a cross between a snort and a sarcastic laugh, and when Yoite glanced uncertainly saw that she was looking at him with undisguised contempt.

- Do not talk nonsense, it is obvious you didn't understand anything! - said. - It 'was just a waste of time allow you to do these stupid tests.

- I'm sorry - he said softly.

Intimately Yoite was the first not to believe in any way that those tests could help him to skip classes and begin the school directly from the third, but just to be entered in a classroom to play them his heart had beat stronger. The teachers then were all so kind that he had ended up feeling really well, still unable to accept the kindness of others without feeling anything other than a little natural embarrassment.

But now her mother's words were full of hatred enough to remember him that he was not entitled to any of that. Immediately bent his eyes, mortified, and raised they again only when Miharu gripped the hem of his jacket.

He had fallen from his chair and approached him so fast as to risk of stumbling, and now was looking at him with an expression full of anguish. It was obvious he wanted to say something nice but did not know how to do until they got the test results, but even only for his attempt Yoite gave him a brief smile.

- I'd like to start from the first class, so I could be with you - he admitted.

Miharu initially seemed happy to hear him say this, moreover always inclined to favor his will, but then shook his head firmly.

- But you would be right to attend the third - said. - Though now you think that you don't want, this is the right way.

Yoite instinctively sought to replicate, not believing that there was a higher justice to the individual will, but he could not open his mouth that a man entered the room.

- I'm sorry to keep you waiting - he said.

The woman gave him a nod and assured him that he should not worry, in a tone so gentle that Yoite ended up to hope that she really thought about what she was saying. It was illogical considering that his mother when they were alone was very clear in expressing his disappointment of having wasted this morning to accompany him to school, but the hope was faster than reasonableness.

The man meanwhile was sitting at his desk, smiling at Miharu who was staring at him earnestly and then going to look at Yoite. He felt intimidated by the weight of his gaze, expecting bitterly his blame for those tests definitely gone bad. Instead, catching him by surprise, he put amicably his hand on the head.

- I have to congratulate you lady, you have a brilliant son - he said. - The test results are excellent, Yoite-kun is a very intelligent child who exceeds the average level of a third class. However we would like that he started with his peers, if you and your husband are in agreement.

The woman this time failed to respond promptly, struggling to compose himself after the impulsive motion of anger and disgust that she had tried to hear those words. Don't recorded the details that Sora had presented himself to the teachers as Yoite, furious at not being able to continue to denigrate him at least from scholastic point of view.

After a few minutes she tried to sketch strictly a thank you, but Yoite this time read in her face evident resentment.

He deemed it absurd that man's words, too used to being judged as unnecessary or harmful - in any case, someone who certainly did not deserve those compliments - to accept them peacefully.

Stared at him hesitantly, not knowing what to do, and avoided the trouble to decide on its own to the Miharu's exclamation.

- I knew that the test would have been good! - He said with evident satisfaction. - If you're so smart means you have to help me learn things I do not understand.

The professor laughed at his comment, and also Yoite felt reassured.

He thought it was incredible that the mere proximity of Miharu could dispel the darkness in which he had always lived, without him doing nothing more than to be by his side and show his affection in a natural way. Yoite believed, in fact, that even Miharu it be really aware of what he was doing.

He wasn't sure to deserve it, but he was always more scared to leave his hand.

* * *

When he had talked about getting help with homework Miharu had originally thought of a unclear future, near but not immediate. Instead, a week after Yoite had performed tests at school Miharu decided to learn the rudiments of reading immediately before the commencement of classes, and was delighted when he accepted to help him.

- Miharu, are you sure that it isn't better to sit at your desk?

- No, I want to stay so.

Yoite didn't insist and sat down on the bed as Miharu had asked him to do. He leaned slowly on pillows that Miharu had put behind his back, still not used to such comfort, and brought his knees to his chest to open more comfortably the book.

When Yoite was near Miharu immediately leaned the head on his shoulder, clutching at his side, and ascertained with satisfaction that Yoite didn't show the slight discomfort that initially had revealed towards the physical contact. Then peered at the opened book with interest.

- how do you read? - asked bluntly.

Yoite hesitated; not remembering, in fact, the moment he learned to do it. He thought that he was always been able to read, even because no one had ever bothered to teach him, and now found it difficult to find an easy way to help Miharu.

- Before, you read me the book - he proposed.

- But it wouldn't be like if I only read you a story? - Yoite said, slightly amused.

- I will follow the words as you read, I promise.

He did not even think to object, believing that Miharu simply had found an elaborate way to stand near to him but not finding this so important. He liked that situation, finding it comforting and warm, so different from the cold solitude to which he was accustomed.

Miharu settled more comfortably next to him when Yoite began to read, happy for their position and to spend time together. He remembered that he had found his voice relaxing and soft since their first meeting. A voice so gentle, but Miharu thought that it could become far if Yoite had given up on having relationships with others; and the idea made him restless enough to cling more to his side.

Miharu did not even want to imagine that a person friendly and sensitive as Yoite could refuse the world, but he was also aware that this could be a natural reaction against a world that had always rejected him.

Miharu suddenly became angry for the laughter of children who felt out of the window, from the garden, knowing that Yoite was perfectly aware that everyone in this place looked at him with hostility.

- At school will surely be all right - said impulsively, with a tinge of urgency in his voice.

Yoite stopped reading, surprised by this sudden statement, but his doubts disappeared when looked Miharu's eyes. He was looking at him with obvious concern, and Yoite had no difficulty to understand why considering that in the last few days often they had been approached aggressively by other children at the orphanage.

He felt sad that Miharu was discriminated because of him, and as if he had read his mind he hastened to speak again.

- It'll be good for _you_ - clarified. - The world is not only this place... definitely you'll be really good at school.

Miharu was firmly convinced about this, always baffled that Yoite could be hated by someone. He adored him, simply, and he found it increasingly difficult to keep his calm when he was mistreated.

- At school, people will not be stupid like here - muttered.

- Miharu...

- It's true, you don't have to defend them!

Yoite was silent, unable to share his anger. In the same way that he had never been able to replicate or to be indignant in front of the allegations of the other children, rather inclined to accept them with pain but resignation.

Miharu however did not allow him to do so, replicating always with such conviction that Yoite was reluctantly forced to go against others to defend him when they ended up getting angry with him.

- ... Yesterday you risked really make you very sick - he said, following the trail of those thoughts. - You shouldn't argue with Taro-san.

- But he had given you a shove and told you that you should disappear! - Miharu said, altering just talking about it. - He's already 13 years old and still abused younger children... he's a coward.

The memory made him darkening, for the hateful words that the boy had turned to Yoite and because despite his wishes at the end was always Yoite to protect him.

- He hadn't hurt you, right? - asked with apprehension.

- Didn't I already told you yesterday?

- Yes, but...

Miharu hesitate to answer, not wanting to admit that honestly he trust very little of the "I'm fine" of Yoite since he would have been able to bear the pain in silence for not to disturb others.

- Me too I ran away after I told you to go - assured Yoite yet.

It wasn't true and Miharu looked at him with an expression enough eloquent to let him know without words that he was not willing to believe him, but Yoite insisted with that version. After all he did not care of the mauvish bruise that had appeared on his ribs after that quarrel, that he had noticed looking furtively at himself in the mirror, but knew that if Miharu had discovered it he would not have reacted well.

- If you do not want to read, we can do something else - proposed to distract him.

He immediately shook his head, not wanting to give up that position, and rather grabbed the hem of the shirt to him impulsively, wanting to feel his presence and to feel himself. Yoite smiled, pushing Miharu to think that he would do anything to continue to see that smile.


	7. the first day of school

**A chapter a bit 'longer than usual, probably these will tend to stretch more and more. This is also a chapter got a little 'lagging behind the others, but I hope this does not become a routine XD**

* * *

Although the weather had been given rain, that morning the first thing that Miharu saw as he was awake was the sun that illuminated the room faintly through the curtains of the window.

He immediately felt relieved, excited not to have to face the first day of school with a bad day, and turned slowly to avoid disturbing the person who still asleep at his side.

After that first night he and Yoite had narrow a tacit agreement about the sleep in the same bed: there was no need to say anything, when one of them did not want to sleep alone could go to the other, with the certainty that he would not rejected

If Yoite the night before hadn't come from him, would have been Miharu to do so.

Knowing that at the right time his mother was coming to awaken them, for now he preferred not to move; staying to observe carefully Yoite still asleep. He couldn't say why, but loved to watch his sleeping face, smiling spontaneously in front of his relaxed expression. Miharu liked his light skin, his soft hair, his dark lashes that created a shadow on his cheeks every time that Yoite bent his head.

Without understanding why he simply loved every single detail of Yoite, with all the naturalness of his age that prevented him from asking himself too many questions.

- Miharu... kun ...

He followed the voice that had called him looking toward the door; where, according to his predictions, Yoite's mother had just come to wake them up. She had interrupted her exclamation forcibly happy seeing them in the same bed, but after a brief uncertainty swallowed any type of grievance.

- You'll be late if you don't start to prepare - said instead, looking insistently only Miharu in spite of Yoite had just opened his eyes and had risen wearily. - Try to get out in ten minutes, today I'll take care to accompany you, Akito-kun and Tsukasa.

She left the room without another word, preventing Miharu to say something about the fourth person that this day would begin school. He resented for this, glad at least that Yoite was still too groggy from sleep to follow the speech.

- Good morning - greeted him, trying to use a very light-hearted tone. - We need to prepare.

Yoite nodded, murmuring a greeting, and got slowly out of bed. Miharu had left the uniforms of both already folded on the chair the night before, and took off his pajamas to wear it without hesitation.

- You don't undress? - He asked, when he realized that Yoite was left standing rigidly.

- ... I - for a moment Yoite panicked, then forced himself to remain calm. - I'm going to change me in the bathroom - said.

- I'm coming too.

- No!

Yoite immediately repented for having rejected Miharu with this hardness, and hated the hurt expression that he took for a moment. Tried to apologize, though restrained by the certainty of not being able to nod, but after seeing him so worried Miharu gave up insisting.

- Wait for me on the landing, we will go down together - said.

Yoite hesitated, fearing that he was only mimicking a calm attitude and in fact he was angry, but when Miharu smiled he calmed down at least a little. Silently grabbed his uniform and headed for the bathroom, relieved to find it empty, and once there turned the key without worrying that his parents might get angry to find the door locked.

Even now that he was alone Yoite hesitated before undressing, but not wanting in any way spoil this day at Miharu - and in the end excited in turn, beyond an current disquiet - forced himself to do so for not delay.

He undressed quickly, dropping his pajamas on the floor. His intention had been to dress without even looking at the mirror, but once naked inadvertently ended up feeling attracted to it. He tried to resist, knowing it would be only painful, but eventually lifted his head slowly.

He put a hand on the smooth, cold, surface - shivering for the contact - and stared at the reflection of his own body.

Even though he was only 8 years Yoite knew enough of the male body to know that his was imperfect. He had studied for months this subject on a large medical book that probably his father had given him on purpose to make him feel inadequate, and without fully understanding the scientific terminology he had at least understood that normal men had to have some bodies _down there_: penis and testicles, as he had memorized from the illustrated description. He had instead only the first even particularly developed; like the rest of his body, starting from the height equal to that of Miharu.

Yoite knew to be a boy but he also knew to be defective, and looking at his appearance suddenly heard the voice of his parents who accused him of being a mistake since birth.

Removed his hand as if it had been burned, and turned away from the mirror to ward off a feeling of nausea that had taken him. Began to dress quickly, flicks but too hasty to be precise, and wiped with the back of his hand the tears that were obscuring his view.

- Don't hate me... - he whispered softly. - At least you, don't hate me.

The fear that Miharu would discover her secret and would despise him for it, was so strong that paralyze. And even if Yoite hated the idea of having to keep a safe distance between them vowed that he would continue to conceal this at any price.

* * *

- Yoite, I'm here!

After what had just happened Yoite had resigned himself to being tense and gloomy all day, instead he naturally relaxed when he saw yet Miharu.

As agreed he had been waiting for him on the landing, and when Yoite came near handed him his backpack.

- The books in your class are heavier - said, impressed.

- The books weigh ever - he answered, pointing out that years earlier he had trouble lifting the large volumes in the cellar.

Yoite liked the expression whereby Miharu was looking at him, really admired, and felt even more heated when he took his hand without hesitation. So was able to ignore the way his mother ignored him, and the nervous glance that the other child gave him; both awaiting in the hall with Tsukasa.

Yoite smiled at his brother, still concerned about what had happened in the bathroom but also just happy for his presence and that of Miharu.

- Miharu-kun and I are in different sections - Tsukasa said after a while, when they were already on the way.

He had deliberately ignored the third child who was with them and would begin the first class, and also Miharu retorted in the same manner.

- However all the classrooms are close, even those of the third - observed.

Yoite had no difficulty in understanding that they were doing it for him, probably thinking that as long as the other children had ignored him then both would ignore their. But he could not find it a right behaviour. The other boy was sad expression of those who feel excluded, and Yoite found naturally talk to him without thinking about his reaction.

- Akito-kun ... in that section are you? - asked gently.

Although he was used to that, he was wounded by the way in which the frightened child went immediately near the mother. She put gently a hand on his head and glanced angrily Yoite.

- Shut up! - ordered him sharply.

- Yes ... I'm sorry.

- You are sorry for _wha_ ...!

Yoite restrained the Miharu's protest tightening strongest his hand and giving him a brief nod. He was still clearly angry, as Tsukasa had become pale, but neither of them said anything at the end.

They were all silent until they arrived at school, and once there Miharu went forward without saying goodbye. After a brief hesitation Tsukasa didn't behave in the same way, returning the greeting of the mother and smiling at her, finding her behaviour unjust but unable to be angry with her. Yoite instead had followed Miharu for not let him go alone, and beyond a natural discomfort not regretted of this choice since he was resigned to having only sadness and nervousness from his mother.

- I would like to be in class with you - Miharu suddenly murmured, looking with suspicion the hallways filled with children.

- Didn't you said that I would have to go in the third class?

- It's so, but they are two different things.

Yoite did not find strange this contradiction, feeling to share it. He was happy and even slightly gratified that his test had gone well, a feeling he had never experienced before, but he would also have liked to be with Miharu.

Yoite resolved at least to stay by his side until he hadn't entered the class, but a voice called to him suddenly.

- Yoite-kun?

He turned, recognizing a nice teachers that he had met the week before. She smiled friendly.

- Your first hour is with me, follow me - he said, placing a hand on her back.

Yoite looked hesitant Miharu, but he did not seem aggrieved. He left his hand, apparently calm, and smiled as if nothing had happened.

- See you later- he said.

- Of course!

Yoite would have liked staying at his side again to make sure that he was really quiet and he was not just pretending, even if Miharu had never had a similar behavior, but the teacher pushed him gently and firmly to follow her.

- Here Yoite-kun, this will be your classroom - she said, stopping in front of a closed door.

Suddenly he began to feel more nervous than before. He was sure to want the opportunity to go to school like everyone else, but only now realized of having no idea of what he should have expected. Miharu had said that there all would be for the best, but in reality he had no guarantees that he would not only find other people who didn't want to have anything to do with him. Then maybe he wouldn't have been able to understand the lessons, maybe those tests went well and by pure chance and...

- Yoite-kun, let's go.

The woman's voice broke the thread of his thoughts more and more frantic, and Yoite was forced to follow her inside the classroom when she opened the door and motioned for him to enter.

The chatter in the room stopped immediately. Yoite felt the urgent need to get out immediately, but the teacher continued to keep a hand on his shoulder. Then he imposed himself to look ahead, even if he did not find particularly encouraging twenty pairs of eyes unabashedly curious that stared at him.

- Well kids, this year you have a new schoolmate - the woman said cheerfully. - Yoite-kun has long been ill, and even if he has the same age as you he was not able to attend school since the beginning of the studies, but I hope that you will welcome him as one of you.

He felt embarrassed about that presentation, discovering only then that he can't bear to be the center of attention, but at least she asked him to go sit down; saving him from saying something personally. Yoite obeyed immediately, sighing relieved when she began the lesson without another word.

* * *

During the lesson Yoite had come to relax totally, totally enraptured by the renewed awareness of being really in school to following the first class of his life, but when the bell rang he went back to get suspicious. The woman interrupted her explanation stating that they would continue after, then she went to the door.

- Wait the teacher of the second hour without make confusion, I recommend! - He said before leaving.

She shot at Yoite a encouraging look that made him smile instinctively, weak in front of that kind of kindness so maternal, but he didn't have time to think that everything was under control that he winced when almost all the other children flocked around his desk.

- Really you were never been to school before?

- What are you, some kind of genius for jumping two classes at once?

- You know you're really small? You're shorter than my younger brother who is still in kindergarten.

- ... But were you very sick?

Yoite felt dazed by the avalanche of questions, not accustomed to all those people too close and much less to all this attention. He tried to answer at least the girl who had asked timidly to the last question, realizing from her tone that she was genuinely worried, but then was held back by the flash memory of what his father had told him.

The memory paralyzed him, wondering how had been able to forget that the man explicitly had commanded him not to establish any kind of relationship to school; ignoring anyone who has spoken to him.

He knew he had to obey but was intimately led to rebel against the idea of rejecting the people who were just trying to be polite, and uncertainty about what to do instinctively pushed him to go out of the class.

Yoite was aware that he had caught everyone off guard and he feared that they would start to avoid him for it, but this thought instead of urging him to turn back spurred him to go without ever looking back.

He easily found the Miharu's classroom, also this in waiting of the teacher of second hour. The door had been left ajar, and he could peek inside without being noticed. Yoite immediately identified Miharu, surprised to see that he was sitting at his desk and was staring absently out the window without interacting with anyone.

In his company he had always been a very active child, so Yoite was disoriented that with the other people Miharu could be so indifferent, apathetic. He didn't know how to react to that discovery, but before he had time to worry about this Miharu noticed him and immediately his face lit up. He got up and ran to him without hesitation, leaving the classroom.

- Are you okay? - he asked with clear expectations.

Yoite couldn't share with him the anxiety that had taken him, nor he wanted to talk to him about what his father had said, so he just smiled and nodded.

- What about you? - asked.

- Yes, well - said Miharu, and Yoite could not help but notice a tinge of boredom in his voice.

- Miharu ...

He tried to say something, even if he did not know how to explain at Miharu that it wasn't right to act only with him without feeling hypocritical considering he really loved his attention, but instead ended to wince when someone tapped him a light blow on the shoulder.

Yoite turned confused, finding himself in front of a classmate. Realized that this child had followed him, but he didn't seem neither annoyed or angry.

- You're in trouble - he began without preamble. - In the second hour we have the ogre, the mathematics teacher, and he hates that the class is not complete when he enters the classroom. Your desk is in front of his chair, so he catched you immediately.

Although it was theoretically a threat Yoite felt only sympathy in his voice, so he was not surprised by the grin that boy gave him.

- However, given that the ogre has sent me to find you I had a good excuse to skip a bit 'of his lesson, so thank you - he concluded. - Probably when we will return he will treat you a bit 'wrong, but you will not have to pay much attention. We call him is the ogre for a reason.

- If he will hurt Yoite then I will talk to him.

The other boy was amazed for the Miharu's peremptory affirmation, then gave a short laugh before putting friendly a hand on his head.

- This formidable bodyguard is your brother? - he asked at Yoite. - Funny that you are so connected, instead my big brother barely speaks to me.

Yoite impulsively started to clear up the misunderstanding and explain that they were not brothers, but when he realized that Miharu did not seem willing to deny - indeed clearly happy that definition - did not find it so important anymore.


	8. the math class

**In this chapter I have reported directly to what is written in the manga, is not invented that Yoite is probably a mathematical genius. In some flashbacks of his childhood he quietly read books of trigonometry, something that theoretically I studied in high school but of which I have never understood a number or a syllable.**

**With the math I've always had a hate/hate relationship, but I can forgive Yoite to be a genius in that field.**

* * *

When the other child - Soichiro as he presented himself without hesitation - had described their teacher with an endless list of insults, Yoite had found natural not to believe him.

He had not protested, but intimately thought the allegations were excessively unfair. As aware that people angry, selfish and rancorous really existed, Yoite found impossible to associate similar characteristics to someone he knew. He had never done even with his father, far from thinking ill of him even though he has vaguely aware that others expected that he did.

So Yoite thought that they were calumnies while walking to get to the classroom, and continued to be convinced of this when, opening the door, the first thing he saw was a chilling look.

- Kudo-kun, where have you been?

At his side Soichiro shivered despite that question, clearly hateful, hadn't been addressed to him; and was shocked when Yoite replied with absolute calm. He didn't understand how Yoite couldn't have noticed that the professor had asked a rhetorical question for the sole purpose of rebuking him, unsure whether to consider him stupid or naive.

- You didn't come, so I had gone to meet... - Yoite hesitated whether to consider Miharu as his brother with a professor, and in the end he preferred not expose themselves so much. - ... A person - concluded.

His peaceful tone for a moment left the man without words, then he narrowed his eyes to the idea that Yoite was teasing him. He had never approved the rector's decision to let him skip those classes, always suspicious of so-called talent, and now he found confirmed his legitimate complaints to the attitude of him, that man catalogued immediately as arrogant.

- My hours are not made to go around to your liking - warned him hard.

- No, of course - Yoite nodded, tilting his head slightly.

Soichiro coughed uncomfortably, unsure whether to go at his desk without an explicit permission or stay there to listen that surreal dialogue. He began to realize that Yoite was anything but mischievous; rather incapable to grasp the nuances of tone or recognize a lie, so simply he take everything too literally.

The professor, meanwhile, had tightened his lips; even more annoyed than before. He curtly ordered at Soichiro going to sit down, but when also Yoite moved to reach his place restrained him with a wave of the hand.

- Go to the blackboard - said instead, - you are the only one of this class of which I still do not know the level and I want to clarify the situation immediately.

He nodded amenably and did as he was asked, waiting in silence when the man stood in front of the blackboard to write down some operations.

When Yoite took the chalk in his hands his first thought was that he had never touched anything of that material and found interesting its consistency, hard but strangely easy to crumble, not thinking that his momentary inattention could be considered a sign of inability to solving those exercises.

- Professor, but this stuff is in the program of the third that we have not yet studied - ventured a little girl in the front row after taking courage.

- Not you, but considering that we are talking about someone who has jumped two classes for the results of a couple of tests I expect him to know solve them with closed eyes.

- With closed eyes no, but I know how to solve them - Yoite said.

The man stabbed him with a threatening look, irritated that his reply was accompanied by suspicious coughing for the whole classroom too similar to the laughter retained. But he couldn't complain when, reluctantly, ascertained that Yoite had really done easily all the exercises.

Not to mention he took the chalk out of the hands of child and wrote another equation, knowing it was pointless to propose an exercise to high schools - because it was simply assumed that Yoite did not know how to resolve it - but too morose to avoid that annoyance.

- Try this - said.

Instead of sitting in the chair he stood with his arms crossed over his chest, and huffed when Yoite started to write with calm expression. He tried to warn him not to invent random numbers, but the words died on his lips after he note that the procedure was correct. The man stared at him in silence while Yoite finished work on the equation, then not knowing whether to be more shocked or disappointed.

The teacher ignored his hesitant gaze, clearly seeking approval, returning to the desk with heavy step.

- I guess your parents have much time to lose at home to teach you personally - said acid.

- No, they do not have much time... - Yoite said lowering his voice, not even mentally specifying that the conclusion of the sentence was "a long time for me."

- Oh, so you would have learned on your own?

- From the books. And then I understand math easily.

The man did not even pretended to believe him, adding to the list of defects which already had branded him that he was a liar. Intelligent, this was undeniable, but always arrogant and liar.

He looked at him sternly, now completely determined not to drop the discussion.

- Then I guess you also know what a logarithm.

- The logarithm of a number is the exponent by which another fixed value, the base, must be raised to produce that number.

Yoite had responded without thinking, with a voice calm but slightly lower than before; as if he had begun to realize that his answers were not making the teacher happy. So he made haste to assure the man who had always wanted to learn from a guide rather than a book, convinced that the problem was that, but when he heard the next question answered instinctively.

- You will know certainly do mental calculations, considering that you understand the mathematics so easily. 11 x 26?

- 286.

The professor this time had been certain that he had asked him something Yoite would never have been able to give a solution. So snorted for his immediate and, he didn't have doubt, completely pull to guess response. He took a piece of paper to quickly make the calculation, and then stiffened finding that the result coincided.

He felt the urge to accuse Yoite of cheating, but there was an awareness - hard to accept but without alternative - that this was impossible considering that the boy was standing in front of his eyes.

The man spoke in a tone now openly hostile.

- 43 x12?

- 516 ...

Though whispered his answer, it was perfectly audible in the deathly silence of the classroom.

Yoite looked at him hesitantly, recognizing in the man's eyes a gleam of anger that was used to seeing in the look of his father. He tried to apologize, even though honestly he didn't understand for what, but was silenced before he could open his mouth.

- Go to your place, _now_ - ordered the professor.

Yoite tried again to speak, but felt discouraged by the way the man had taken blatantly to ignore him. So he sat down without making a sound, feeling much less happy to be in the front row and look good to the desk.

For a few minutes a tense silence continued to hover in the classroom, then the professor opened with a sharp gesture the register and began to make the call as if nothing had happened in the first quarter of an hour.

Yoite didn't dare look around to see the expressions of the other children, trying not to satisfy the wish to get up and go to Miharu. He was frightened to find himself more and more dependent on him, ready to run near him when happened something wrong, not wanting to be a burden and realizing that it wasn't fair to rely to a younger child. Rather Yoite would like to become strong enough to help Miharu always and under all circumstances, but he didn't know how if an incident like that was enough to destabilize him.

Yoite was so absorbed in his thoughts that he did not notice when the teacher came to call his name neither the first nor the second time, startled by the man's impatient exclamation.

- Kodo!

- Yes, it's me - said, though he had never used before that surname.

He scolded himself for having given a further source of irritation to the professor, but the man rather frowned for something that was written in the class register.

- I thought you said to call Yoite? - investigated.

- I ... yes.

The man looked at him with impatience now abundantly clear.

- The only Kodo of this class is called Sora, not Yoite - said through gritted teeth. - Are you Sora Kodo or not?

He was forced to nod, although had a strange effect to discover that, despite everything, his father had marked him at the register of births with that name. However, this not helped him to feel it nearest, seeking rather to explain that he wanted to be called only Yoite.

- But no one has ever considered me as Sora - he said, preferring not to admit that this was the name of the never born baby girl of which he had taken the place. - I'd like to be called Yoite ... if possible.

The professor from the beginning he had to impose self-control for not to respond too bad, repeating himself that even if arrogant and annoying he still remained a child, but to listen his request lost all patience.

- Do not waste my time with some hooey! - rebuked him. - Your name is Sora and certainly you can't change it.

Yoite bowed his head, discouraged by the final reply, lifting it again only when he heard a whisper behind him. She turned hesitantly, meeting the gaze of the same child, Soichiro, who had gone to look for him outside the classroom.

- Don't worry about the ogre, he hates everyone - he said softly, putting his hand close to mouth. - The ogre will always use the last name to call you, so isn't important the history of the name. If you prefer Yoite-kun, we will do so. Oh, I officially want to do the math homework with you, even if others ask you I'll be the first ok? You did whiten the ogre, you really are a force!

Yoite was initially intimidated by this stream of words, but when Soichiro gave him a smirk couldn't help but return it.

He couldn't accept his compliment, feeling rather guilty for having disturbed the professor, but at least he knew that the child was really sincere to talk like that.

Yoite thought of the words of his father warned him not to talk to anyone and then to those of Miharu who promised him that things would be better there at school, and after a short conflict strove to believe only in the latter. He had never disobeyed his parents then had no idea how they would react if they found his behaviour, but at least for the moment he would not think about it.

- It's ok for the repeats... - answered. He thought it over for a moment, then added. - But you're not the first - clarified, - Miharu had already asked me to help him with homework, and he always comes first.

Yoite feared he had offended him, as far remained convinced that he could not avoid that clarification, but Soichiro merely shrugged.

- Done, I'll settle for second place. And I do reserve the possibility to corrupt you with sweets before class assignments. My family has a patisserie, you have to come one of these days.

Yoite nodded instinctively, preferring not to admit that he had never tasted a sweet in his life.

He started to say that he would surely come along with Miharu, but when Soichiro hastily motioned him to turn realized that the professor must have been aware that they were inattentive. He turned away, trying to appear focused, but soon ascertained that the man was staring at him as if he were incinerated.

However, as vaguely aware that it was very normal, Yoite found his reaction always preferable to being ignored. Even though it was hostile it can make him feel real, truly present in the courtroom, so Yoite didn't protest when he abruptly informed him that would have given extra tasks as punishment.

- All right - said quietly.

He didn't understand that with that calm had definitively attacked the man's capacity of forbearance, feeling strangely light even though it was all too clear that it would be difficult to get along with him.


	9. jealousy and conflict

**This chapter concludes the period about the school, the start of school to be precise, and the next will enter a different saga.**

**For your information I have just finished writing chapter 15, now I've totally lost any prediction about the length of this fiction XD**

* * *

Before his meeting with Miharu, Yoite had always considered the time as a thing indefinitely and, paradoxically, hard in a ruthless manner. He had never been able to accurately grasp its unceasing flow, trapped in a claustrophobic world that had the beginning and the end in the cellar from which he hardly ever left, but in this vagueness Yoite felt the weight of even a single minute.

At the time he had consoled himself with all the books he could find, grateful that his father had never thought to empty the cellar by boxes filled with everything in the house was not used anymore, but even if he tried not to think about it, he was aware that his condition was hopeless.

Since had arrived Miharu, however, all was completely different, so radically that sometimes Yoite still couldn't believe it real.

From the day they met had spent a month and twelve days - although Yoite with Miharu preferred not to admit that he calculated the hours in that way a bit' manic - and then the time was spent in a clear way. Simply normal in the eyes of anyone, he just knew, but Yoite considered incredible this commonplace, daily life.

- Yoite-kun, good morning!

- ... Hello, Soichiro-kun.

He waved back with what he hoped was a firm voice, remembering also the honorific suffix to use, but immediately realized that he had used a tone too apprehensive; as always. The other boy frowned, looking puzzled.

- I do not understand why every time someone greets you, you've always that look of someone who does not know what to do - he said, entirely in good faith. - It seems that before coming to school you've never talked to anyone.

_Yes ... you are right_, Yoite said mentally.

- You have done your homework for today? - asked instead, eclipsing the question.

This was a rhetorical question so that Soichiro could ask him the notebooks to copy. So smiled when he admitted with carefree tone did not understand anything of grammar and mathematics exercises, but when Yoite pulled out books from the bag Soichiro put a hand on his shoulder.

- In exchange today you come to me? - he proposed. - Did I mention that my family runs a bakery, right? I'll buy you anything you want!

- No, no ... it isn't necessary.

- Of course it's necessary! - Soichiro said, frowning for the Yoite's obvious voltage. - In fact, you should seriously begin to trade your tasks with all the others. I understand that you're kind and you're also the most intelligent that does not need anyone's help with school ... but it isn't fair that you help everyone gratis.

Yoite didn't know what to say, taken aback by that speech.

From the very beginning he was always eager to help anyone who asked him for help, but he realized that his was also a way to secure a role in the class, to consider himself an integral part of the group. Intimately he felt a slight discomfort for this, feeling disloyal and aware of how was false a bond based on something like that, but it was a feeling that disappeared compared with the need to have a real contact with others.

Yoite then had never even dared to imagine something in return, and his instinctive reaction was to refuse.

- I don't need anything - he said.

As soon as he finished speaking he was assailed by the fear that Soichiro would eventually find him unbearable as all and move away, preferring to ignore a person like him, but before he could really become worried Soichiro merely issued a deep sigh.

- Everyone needs some sweets - decreed bluntly. - So today come with me. Thread closed.

In his apparent arrogance the firmness with which he spoke was able to feel Yoite more relaxed, at least enough to make him reflect about the offer beyond the doubt that he deserves it or not. Yoite imagined that Miharu would probably be happy, and was above all this that made him nod.

- Today Miharu had already said that he wanted to exit - said to himself.

Soichiro tried to object that in fact he had only invited him, without little brothers behind, but then realized that it was useless. If he had learned something about Yoite during that month, was that think him regardless of Miharu was something impossible; considering that they are separated practically only during their lessons. So gave up to say to Yoite that he could spend an afternoon alone

- All right, we shall also bear the brat... - he sighed, careful not to be heard by Yoite. - Now pass me the notebooks? - then asked, his voice rising briskly. - If I take failure in mathematics my mother probably kill me, so no candies for you. It's in your interest to try to make me smart for the next hour, so let's go.

* * *

- Miharu-kun, don't you go home?

- No ... today I and Yoite go out.

His response apparently was simple and clear, but Tsukasa read clearly what was left implicit: _we go out without permission, you're going to tell?_

As well as the question had not been asked to him directly he didn't say anything explicit, merely a nod of the head eloquent. Tsukasa knew that his father would be angry with him if he had accidentally discovered that Miharu and Yoite had returned home long after the end of school, but he couldn't think of betraying them.

Why this wasn't the first time that they spent the afternoon away without being detected, with both parents involved in the work, and because Tsukasa had always felt guilty for the admonition that his father had given him from day to check that Yoite come home without talking to anyone.

- Today my mother will stay out late - he said vaguely.

- I know - Miharu replied simply.

He had no difficulty to believe this, as always been convinced that it was Miharu to organize those outputs.

More Tsukasa discovered about Miharu and more he realized that the child was really like Yoite, as if their inner essences were made of the same material, but there were also substantial differences that allowed them to complement each other.

Yoite would never have taken advantage of the absence of his mother to sneak out, Miharu yes.

Tsukasa was convinced that no one could compensate for the excessive kindness of his brother better than him, he admitted this without difficulty.

- How did you convinced So... Yoite to come with you? - he asked, genuinely curious.

- Why he should not have? - Miharu replied.

- Because he knows that my father does not want to, and he always tries not to upset anyone.

Tsukasa's response was frank and direct, and even if he didn't want to Miharu was forced to nod. He did not like to admit it was always difficult to bring Yoite out of the house, because inevitably ended up remembering that still had not been able in any way to convince him to dine at the table with everyone else.

- Blackmail - then replied dryly. - As long as he does not accept to follow me in the kitchen for dinner, I can at least ask him to go out sometimes without making him feel too guilty.

- Oh ... I see - Tsukasa said, lowering his voice.

After a brief hesitation he preferred not to say that Miharu that the dinner was a losing battle; because his father had given on far more important issues, so he would never given up on keeping away Yoite from his table.

- At the bottom is not so important - ventured. - He can dine in his room and...

- Yes it is, he shouldn't feel left out even for a moment!

- But Yoite _is_ excluded from that house - Tsukasa said with reasonable tone. Unexciting enough that Miharu got mad, but also genuinely saddened to prevent him from accusations. - There's no use denying reality.

- But it's wrong!

- Yes ... I know.

Miharu didn't know how to answer that calm statement, but even Tsukasa seemed to want to close the discussion. He greeted Miharu with a nod of the head and hurried away without adding anything, walking in silence.

Once alone he went to lean against the wall of the entrance, waiting that Yoite also came out of school and join him. Miharu didn't understand why he were using a long time, not impatient as simply worried that something could have happened, and when finally heard his voice calling him immediately turned with relief.

- Yoi... te

His happy exclamation became a suspicious murmur when Miharu saw the child who was next to Yoite.

- Miharu-kun, good morning! - Soichiro greeted him cheerfully.

- Sorry to keep you waiting - Yoite said, exhausted. - I'm late with the cleaning of the classroom.

Miharu looked from one to the other, but before he could say anything Soichiro responded first to the last statement of Yoite. He seemed annoyed, and looked at him crossing his arms over his chest.

- Cleaning that today you shouldn't have done - he said.

- Kairi asked me if I could take his place, he had an urgent task and had to go straight home - Yoite said, a little defensively.

Miharu imitated the same Soichiro's frown, but he was angry when the child gave voice to those who were his thoughts.

- It's the same excuse of the week before, so you can't be fooled! In general, you have to stop always satisfy everyone.

Yoite preferred not to answer, smiling at Miharu for groped to eclipse the issue. But he couldn't smile back as he knew he should have. He tried to do it, but he felt his face rigid.

Miharu was happy to see Yoite more comfortable with his classmates, though he was always too kind and easy to be exploited, he was convinced of this. Yet even felt a feeling quite different from contentment; much creeping and unpleasant, too similar to jealousy.

At the beginning of their relationship him and Yoite were found in a small world built for them only, but now - with the school and the new knowledge - the horizons of both were expanding. Miharu personally didn't consider it a problem, finding only natural put a clear dividing line between Yoite and others, but the fear that he wouldn't do it often pushing him to take a hostile attitude with his companions.

- Shall we go? - he asked, totally ignoring Soichiro.

Yoite noticed a hint of harshness in his tone, but thinking it was because of the waiting he found no reason not to propose something that he was sure would make him happy.

- Today we can go at Soichiro-kun's home - said.

- But we had to go out together! - Miharu immediately protested, stung.

- Yes, that's why. His parents had a bakery, he offered us to take what we want.

- No budget problems - he agreed.

Soichiro had easily noticed that the Miharu's hostility was addressed to him, saying to himself that the brat was clearly jealous of his brother; so, unlike Yoite, he was not at all stunned by his response.

- You can go alone - Miharu snapped.

Miharu turned pale at the same moment when he finished say those words, only then realizing what he had said. Immediately tried to apologize, mortified, but before he could say anything Yoite hastened to tell him it did not matter. Miharu felt even more guilty looking his wound expression and ended up totally to blame himself when Yoite forced a smile.

- We can go home if you do not want to go out, do not worry - Yoite assured him.

- I ...

Miharu didn't know what to tell him, overcome with remorse that he managed to snatch at him that rueful smile that was one of the things he most hated.

Soichiro felt the situation become too tense, more than he had ever expected. Actually he understood very little about the thoughts of both, but still tried to defuse the atmosphere.

- Children should not make a fuss - he said cheerfully, placing a hand on the Miharu's head and ruffling his hair. - Come on. I'm sure you'll have fun, who is so foolish as to refuse the free sweets?

This time Miharu quickly nodded, wishing only to be able to remedy at his previous error.

- Sure, let's go! - he said.

- Miharu, you don't have ...

- I want to go, really - he said, interrupting the Yoite's uncertain murmur.

Miharu looked at him with ill-concealed anxiety, waiting for his reaction, and he felt a small pang in front of his smile; stayed the same as before. Sad but unshakable, the typical smile that Yoite showed when he was really hurt by something but equally determined not to admit this for not to disturb the others.

Miharu hated himself for it, but he couldn't find words enough compelling to explain to Yoite how good he wanted at him and that his reaction was dictated solely by a stupid jealousy.

Miharu desired ardently similar words, but all he did was to follow him in silence outside the school.

* * *

Before their quarrel - if he could call it in this way, and Miharu doubted of this considering that Yoite had not shown any intention of getting angry with him - they had always been so in harmony that neither of them was prepared to handle a tense atmosphere.

After that afternoon spent at the Soichiro's confectionery, Miharu had the illusion that things between him and Yoite could return to normal even without a real explanation that he didn't feel able to give. So that they simply could go home and have dinner as usual alone in the room, or maybe that this day Yoite would be willing to follow him into the kitchen.

Instead Yoite had pushed him with unusual firmness to go eat with the whole family, and when Miharu had protested he had just smiled again and tell him that he wasn't hungry after all those sweets. Which was impossible considering that he had barely tasted one without any enthusiasm, Miharu was fully aware of this, but had not been able to resist when he had read in his eyes that Yoite really wanted to see him dine in the kitchen.

However yielding to leave him alone Miharu had increased his sense of guilt, and in a vicious circle more he felt painfully uncomfortable with him more Yoite had continued to push him to attend other children.

Rationally Miharu wished to scream that Yoite was wrong to think that he don't wanted to be with him, that Yoite was a complete idiot for having interpreted his nervous shot in this way; but the voice were always stuck in his throat.

More than a week had passed that way, and on the morning of the tenth day Miharu woke up very moody.

- Miharu-kun, I'm sorry if today ... yes, well ...

- It doesn't matter - he cut short a colourless voice.

Tsukasa gave him a uncertain look, finding hard to believe that Miharu was indifferent as he wanted to believe. However it was also true that his expression was imperturbable, to the point that Tsukasa ventured to think that perhaps Miharu really didn't care if that morning no one would see him during the day dedicated to families; in which the parents could assist at the lessons of their children.

- Your mom is just your, it's normal that she will come to see you - Miharu repeated, as to emphasize the concept.

- If we were in the same class there would be no problems - Tsukasa said resentfully.

- It doesn't matter - he said, shrugging.

- But I'm sorry.

Miharu didn't answer this time, taking advantage of the fact that they were almost arrived at school to accelerate the step. He suffered to ignore Yoite, who during his dialogue with Tsukasa had continued to stare at him intensely, but now he felt too confused in his presence to be able to deal him that day.

The night before Miharu had repeated himself that he didn't care anything about a stupid parent's day, that he was indifferent to be the only one without a father or a mother came to look at him; but he felt an uncomfortable knot in his throat when, entering the classroom, he saw the small crowd of adults already present.

However, he walked decided next to his classmates and sat down at his desk, looking insistently out of the window. He wanted to think about Yoite, and he knew that normally this would give him the tranquility he wanted, but now the thought of him was inseparable from pain.

Then he tried not to think about anything, by imposing itself the maximum detachment, and even when the teacher began the lesson he never moved his eyes from the book. When he heard the door being open he felt no curiosity about that parent arrived late, and turned briefly only following a weak instinct.

Miharu had expected to see a breathless mother, then opened his eyes in surprise to find that, instead, Yoite had just entered.

He was looking around, remaining on the sidelines to avoid attracting the adult's attention, and when their eyes met he smiled. Nor with his fake smile or with that sincere but bitter, both brought to reassure the others totally ignoring himself, but with an expression so sweet that Miharu felt the knot in his throat begin to melt.

Miharu wanted to get up to go to him, but he forced himself to pretend to be interested in the lesson although he felt impatient as it happened rarely. The Yoite's gesture had taken him completely by surprise, but at least at that time he tried to be simply happy without reflecting on the reasons and the possible implications. Yoite had come there for him, and that was enough.

Miharu became increasingly impatient with the passage of time, and when he finally heard the bell announcing the end of the first hour jumped up before anyone else. Then, however, waited for the other children were moving so as not to draw attention to Yoite, aware that in general he couldn't bear to be seen by too many people and especially not now that he was where he shouldn't have been.

When Miharu was sure to be able to move safely approached him, but the previous heat became the discomfort of the last few days when he found himself really at his side. Miharu gave him a brief hesitant look, sigh of relief when Yoite spoke first.

- You learned to read very well - he said.

- Oh ... yes, thank you - Miharu replied, realizing after a while that Yoite was referring to the text that he read aloud during the lesson. - It is thanks to you.

As he had widely expected Yoite shook his head, immediately denying every possible merit, but this time Miharu avoided to argue about his attitude, even if it was unbearable to him. Instead looked at Yoite hesitantly, unsure of how to address the issue of their recent fight.

- And your classes? - asked at the end, not knowing how else to begin.

He felt that he couldn't be happier for his gesture, but that was still the first time they were talking seriously after more than ten days and he was not quite sure how to judge it. Yoite, however, did not seem tense, or at least answered his question calmly.

- I jumped it - he said.

That was obvious, Miharu had understood even by himself, but to hear him admit it with frankness left him stunned. Because Yoite loved school, with all the passion of something long desired and long denied, and for his pathological incapacity to disobey the rules.

- For me? - Miharu ventured to ask.

Yoite looked at him doubtfully before nodding, as he consider the answer too obvious and undeserving of a question. But then his expression darkened, and looked down on the ground.

- It's good that you no longer wish to be with me, really - he said quickly, as if he was forced to say something he had felt for a long time inside him. - But I still want to be near you. Without bothering you, only on occasions like this where there is no other and ...

- Yoite, but are you stupid?

Miharu had not meant to silence him so abruptly, but these words had cancelled all his patience. He already knew that Yoite had interpreted his shot nervous, and as result of this the distance of the last days, like a demonstration of the fact that he no longer wanted to be in his company; but to hear it from his mouth still irritate him.

Miharu looked at him firmly in the eye, hearing fade all the previous insecurity that had plagued recently.

- That day I told you to go alone to the bakery not because I didn't want to come with you, but because I was annoyed that there was also your friend - he admitted. - I wanted to go out only with you, you understand? I was afraid that you were better off with your new friends than with me.

Miharu hesitated, fearing that Yoite could get angry and would have considered him an selfish capricious, but he just stared at him a bit' amazed. Yoite employed few seconds to properly record the Miharu's words, then his expression became simply confused.

- You really think I'd prefer to be with someone else rather than with you? - he asked, in a tone that implied that he considered absurd even to ask that question. - Miharu, but you ...

Hesitated, unable to complete the sentence, but Miharu understood that at least Yoite had thought to ask him if he was not stupid.

Miharu felt himself so, in fact, for the realization that his grief was completely useless and senseless when it would be so easy just to talk frankly to Yoite.

- Then don't you prefer the company of Soichiro or somebody? - he asked, more for the fun to hear him say that for necessity.

- Of course not! - Yoite exclaimed, in a tone unusually hotly.

Miharu didn't need anything else to finally swallow the lump of negative feelings that in those endless days had weighed in his chest. Suddenly too cheerful pulled a sleeve of Yoite's sweater, little petulant, eager to be spoiled from him.

- Today, after school, we go to eat sweets? - Miharu asked. - Your father gave me my pocket money yesterday.

He hesitated imperceptibly to realize that he was indelicate, but Yoite gave the impression that he hadn't even registered the fact that his father given money to all the children in their home but him. Miharu noticed that he was much interested in his proposal, and this led him to write down the information that, apparently, Yoite had to have a certain fondness for sweets after having tasted these the first time.

- Shall we go? - urged him.

Yoite nodded, and even if he wanted to hug him Miharu forced himself to be limited to a smile; aware of the other adults around them that were beginning to look at them suspiciously.


	10. small machinations

**I think it's better to explain, for the sake, some questions about the Japanese school that are present in this chapter.**

**Actually I guess everyone knows them, however I point that in Japan the school year begins in April. For this at July, where begin the summer holidays for about a month in a half, Yoite thinks he has had 3 months of school. Also, in Japan, the primary schools takes 6 years.**

* * *

- Well kids, that's all. Place carefully the paper that I have handed to you in your folder and give it to your parents tonight, tomorrow you will return it to me with their signature.

The teacher nodded to the chorus of assents received, despite the children didn't appear enthusiastic. He honestly couldn't blame them for this, knowing that being in third they had already endured for two years this summer camp that he considered it ill-suited to the kids on vacation. But it was a project strongly supported by the dean, and no teacher had ever dared to point out to him that was arguably fun a week spent working in the fields of a remote agricultural high school in Hokkaido.

- Come on, it'll be fun - he said with optimism.

- Last year I was chased by a cow escaped from the enclosure - snorted a child in the third row.

- The first year I've been bitten by a chicken!

- You must say "caught", stupid, hens do not have teeth.

- Yes, well, their beaks hurts!

- Then it's absurd to have the same trip for all classes of elementary school, I do not want to be with little kids or older ones!

- Me neither... the guys in the sixth grade are always bullies.

- Last year they stole my snack!

While a controversy raged, badly controlled by the teacher, Yoite continued to stare the sheet in his hand with dejected expression. He felt mocked by that little empty space where his father was supposed to put a signature to allow him to participate in the trip, so simple in appearance.

It was now three months that he attended school, and the arrival of that particularly sultry July has only been able to make him depressed. He didn't want the summer holidays began. He wouldn't admit it out loud to not generate a number of uncomfortable questions by his companions, who clearly wanted only the end of the school, but Yoite couldn't help but feel more and more sad as they approached the last day of the first quarter.

- So the hellish week has come again this year - Soichiro sighed, leaning toward him. - It's your first time, but you have to expect the worst of the worst.

- ... I'd like to go - Yoite murmured.

Soichiro looked him a bit 'surprised, not noticing that Yoite had spoken as if he wouldn't be able to take part in the trip, then shrugged.

- If you're happy... - he said. - Professor Umino this year will be satisfied to have at least one participant in our class who doesn't dream only to return home. You know, he is the only one that supports the dean in this madness. I guess because he is born in Hokkaido, his family has a herd of cows.

Soichiro spoke quietly, so he was puzzled when he saw Yoite's expression darken even more and the way in which he took advantage of the bell's ringing for grab his things and leave. From that Soichiro could remember it had never happened that Yoite would go away without saying goodbye, rather always careful to be friendly with everyone, but something in his eyes discourage him from asking questions.

* * *

Yoite hadn't noticed that he had gone away without saying anything, his mind occupied only by the thought of how he could give to his father that permission without triggering a too negative reaction.

Yoite was sure that the man already knew well of that trip considering that every year he signed a stack of those permissions for all the children of the orphanage who attended the same elementary school, and Yoite even sifted the chance to put his paper in the pile with hope that his father would sign it without realizing.

But then dismissed this immediately, berating himself for that devious idea.

- Yoite, also you have received the trip program?

He nodded to the Miharu's exclamation, just arrived at his side at the entrance gate, realizing he had continued to tighten the paper in his hand instead of putting it in his backpack.

- Yes - said in a low voice.

Yoite was sure that Miharu had understood enough of his family to know that he would never have had permission to leave, but he strove to behave in a normal way for not to sadden him further. However Miharu listened to his words without special attention, focused on other things, and suddenly gave him a intense look.

- If you shall not leave even I will not go, of course - he clarified, taking out this argument as if Yoite in the last minute hadn't tried to talk about something else. - But don't worry, we'll be leaving both.

- Miharu, this isn't...

- You'll see.

Initially Yoite thought that Miharu harboured a unmotivated trust and he just find it a little bitter, thinking that this would inevitably be betrayed, but his smile too satisfied after a while made him suspicious. So Yoite tried to ask for explanations, worried about what Miharu could do to try to convince his father, but he continued to deflect questions without opening his mouth.

When they got home Miharu went to their room without waiting for him, something he never did, then sat down on the bed and showing himself immersed in reading a book.

- Miharu, I know you're pretending to read because you're not telling me something - Yoite remarked calmly.

- It 'a guide of the Hokkaido's campaign - he said quietly, as if he hadn't heard his remark. - We have to inform us.

- Miharu ...

- Yoite, you have never tasted cow's milk straight from the cow?

- No, never. But now I'm trying to talk ...

- And you've never eaten eggs freshly harvested? They seem to be much good.

- … _Miharu_

- Don't you like eggs? - he asked innocently.

Yoite didn't insist, knowing it was impossible win against Miharu when he pulled out that attitude: able to pretend that there wasn't even a discussion.

Suddenly Yoite felt tired, so he lay down in bed in turn and closed his eyes; finding relaxing for the feeling of the warm sun's rays on his skin. When he lived in the basement had got into the habit of seeking the most illuminated spot on the floor, taking advantage of the light and the heat until they had remained, and even now he ended unconsciously to curl up in that way.

The child looked at him sideways at him, knowing from experience that he would fall asleep shortly. Miharu had always thought that Yoite looked like a cat when he behaved like that, and although usually he wanted to stay at his side, now he didn't dare move for fear of waking him. Yoite asleep was the best thing that he could think for those hours of waiting, so now he just hoped that _this person_ came as soon as possible.

* * *

At first it was just a background noise, not insistent enough to disturb him, but then he turned into a loud ringing that tore him from sleep.

Without understanding what was happening Yoite repeatedly slammed the eyelids, trying to wake up at all despite the sleepiness, and immediately became lucid when he realized that someone had rung the door and, above all, Miharu had run out of the room to go see.

Yoite had now learned that he was basically a lazy person. Someone who could become active under certain circumstances, but that would _never_ have gone to open the door with enthusiasm. This assurance, combined with the strange Miharu's attitude of this morning, pushed Yoite to run immediately behind him

Yoite honestly had no idea about that situation but he understood that any theory would pale in front of reality when he saw one of his teachers who warmly clasped a hand to his mother.

- Umino sensei is always on time - said Miharu satisfied.

Yoite was startled to hear Miharu's voice at his side, realizing only then that he hadn't approached the door but he was hiding under the stairs, from which he could have a strategic view of the entrance and the adjacent living room.

- Miharu, but what ...

Instead of answering he put a finger to his mouth to make him a sign to be silent, then grabbed him by the wrist and pushed him to sit at his side. Yoite agreed without protest, managing to hide just seconds before his mother and the professor would pass near the stairs to the living room.

She was clearly uncomfortable, taken aback like Yoite by this sudden visit, while the man was jovial and relaxed as ever.

- The man who teaches physical education in a elementary school was perfect for this role - Miharu whispered, making compliments to himself.

- _Role_?

- Now you will understand.

Yoite didn't doubt that he would soon understand, but he was worried for the possible consequences. He already grew nervous due to the strained expression of his mother, and when even his father came with annoyed air Yoite almost thought he might get angry with Miharu, but then remembered that it was simply impossible to be angry with him.

However, while trying to tell himself that wouldn't be nothing serious happened, he lost colour to feel professor's statement.

- I came to tell you about Yoite-kun.

He focused on Miharu to not have to see the look of both parents become totally hostile, and feeling his tension the child turned to smile at him.

- Do not worry, everything's fine - he whispered.

Yoite tried to return his smile, but he felt a knot in my stomach at the thought that a professor had come to the house to talk about something that concerned him. He knew that his father would take advantage of any excuse to prove that he was not fit to attend school, and even though it was obvious that Miharu had acted with good intentions Yoite felt the creeping fear that whatever was his idea this could prove disastrous.

Knowing, however, that he couldn't go away without being seen Yoite forced himself to remain calm, listening to the Professor Umino's booming voice who apologized for the annoyance of his sudden visit. It was noisy and lively, like all of the man, the voice that might have been expected from someone raised in the countryside surrounded by nature.

- That kid did something wrong? - asked point-blank Mr. Kodo, in theory worried but in practice with an expectation so obvious that Yoite hid his face between his knees before having to listen to the professor's answer.

He stood amazed for a moment, then burst into laughter.

- Oh, not really! - Exclaimed. - Yoite-kun is the best student of his year, if we should really find a fault at him it would be that he is too smart.

More than for those words, Yoite relaxed for the tone really excited with which the man had uttered them. He didn't raise his head to avoid having to look at the disappointed expression of his father, but he managed to breathe again normally. Miharu, however, was openly impatient and full of expectations, staring up at the professor and waiting that him say something.

The man cleared his voice, then took a sheaf of papers from his bag and placed it on the table in front of where he sat. Even straining his look Yoite couldn't tell what it was, but he found eloquent the tight lips of his parents.

- I suppose you know that in a few days our school will hold its annual agrarian week for elementary grades - the professor began.

- Yes ... we know - replied stiffly Mr. Kodo. - But Yoite not...

- That's why I'm here - the other man interrupted him. - I know that you don't want to send him on this trip, Miharu-kun told me everything.

Yoite unwittingly imitated the same shocked expression of his father, then stared at Miharu with a look of disbelief. He felt a dizziness for the idea that Miharu had talked to a teacher of their family situation, not doubting that had acted in good faith but aware that this could lead to serious consequences.

Ever since he was able to reason Yoite had always realized that the way in which he was raised wasn't normal, and then to him had been enough read some books about similar situations for understand that it was also illegal. He knew it, and this awareness was the reason why he had never dared to say anything when he came out of the house.

Even his parents paled, but before they could venture an explanation the teacher returned to speak.

- Miharu-kun told me that Yoite-kun has been ill for many years, so you fear that a trip to the countryside can be risky for his health - he said.

He had not noticed that the man and the woman in front of him were even more shocked for those words, totally out of breath, and then they had emitted a deep sigh: between relief and anger. He thought that they were tense because of the concern, and felt more motivated to continue.

- I understand you're nervous about your son, but I have come to assure you that a natural climate is ideal for a person in poor health! - exclaimed with fervour. - The air is much purer than that of the city, and if it will make you feel more confident I can assure you that I personally will check the kid.

Yoite was still troubled by the previous fear, and even though it was now obvious what was the Miharu's plan - and although he could honestly recognize that this was smart - he could neither share nor appreciate it.

Miharu didn't notice his disappointment, concentrated to observe how his father was trying unsuccessfully to find an excuse to reply to the teacher's arguments. Mr. Kodo - particularly irritated by man's enthusiasm - was just about to blurt out and admit that absolutely he didn't care about Yoite's health and the only thing he wanted was that this brat wasn't treated normally, but at the last he forced himself to nod.

He looked at the professor Umino, who continued to speak with inspired expression of the benefits of country life, and decided to interrupt him to close the matter there.

- Okay, he can go! - said sharply.

He didn't even try to pretend to be happy, but the other man didn't seem to give weight to that attitude; nodding smiling for his answer.

Miharu rejoiced inwardly, all along extremely full of confidence for that plan but now relieved to have got confirmation that this had really worked, then pulled the sleeve of Yoite's shirt to attract his attention.

- Let's go out - he whispered.

Yoite didn't answer, but when Miharu slipped out silently from their hiding he followed him without asking anything. They opened the door quietly and went beyond even the garden, going out on the street. They walked in silence until they reached the small park not far. Here Miharu immediately approached the pond, cowering on the shore and starting to throw pebbles into the water.

Yoite found his behavior deliberately carefree and innocent, as if Miharu knew that he would get only a thank you for what he had done and was hoping to divert his attention that way. In another situation Yoite would satisfied him, but now he was too restless for the accumulated tension.

- I preferred to go out to avoid your father - Miharu suddenly said, taking the word first. - You know, I had the impression that after having sent away the Professor Umino if he found us he would have made a outburst.

Yoite nodded, agreeing easily, and the thought that Miharu was continuing to challenge his parents in this imprudent way managed to increase his nervousness. His father had never been a man prone to physical violence but Yoite knew how the words could hurt, and he could not tolerate that Miharu was injured by some cruel accusation.

- You will not have to do anything like this anymore - he said firmly.

- You would have never asked a teacher to come home to convince your parents? - Miharu asked.

- No... sure.

- Yeah, that's why I did it.

Miharu's logic looked flawless, but Yoite frowned realizing that it was based on a basic concept entirely wrong. He doesn't often discussed to defend his beliefs, but these remained strict.

- Miharu ... what you did is called manipulation - said reproachfully.

- I know - he agreed, continuing to throw stones into the water with tranquillity.

- Isn't a beautiful thing, do not ever do that again.

This time Miharu turned briefly, looking at him with a sharp look.

- Less beautiful than the way your father treats you? - replied.

He hadn't wanted to be so aggressive and repented for this, but, equally, he considered irritating the firmness with which Yoite refused to hate or speak evil of his parents. It made him cringe at the idea of what would have happened if Yoite had lived alone in that family situation, if they had never met, and anxiety fuelled anger.

He threw a stone with more strength, watching it to sink in the water.

- I don't care about anything - he admitted, lowering his voice. - I just care about you, about all I can do for and with you. And I think that when you are interested in something you must act. I wanted to go on a trip together, and I acted accordingly. That's it.

- Miharu ...

- You really think that is so wrong?

Yoite realized he could not answer the latter question without hurting both, so he ended up to shake his head in denial. He thought it was wrong to manipulate people, this was still a certainty, but at least at that time he didn't want to accuse yet Miharu.

- I am happy to leave - he said, and at least this was simply true.

Miharu smiled at hearing his statement, intuiting relieved that the discussion had ended. He stopped throwing stones and stood up, taking off a bit of land from his pants. He was more openly in a good mood, again concentrated only on his success and the forthcoming holiday.

- We never even took the car together - remarked cheerfully, - as it will get on a bus? I know that we are divided by last name instead for that class, then we can sit together. In fact I shouldn't use Kodo, but it seems that during trips for convenience your father lend his last name to all children.

Yoite was interested in that particular, not so much for the idea of travelling with Miharu - though certainly this made him happy - but for the fact of being able to have his same surname for a little time, as if that would serve to bring their closer.

- But in the future you'll never challenge my father, and you must stop manipulating people - said categorically. - Okay, Miharu?

He hesitated before answering, a bit irritated that Yoite was so stubborn with that story instead of thinking only of their trip, and substantially uncertain whether lie to him or not. He didn't even think to acquiesce in earnest, quietly convinced to continue that way as long as he needed to get everything he wanted, but eventually shook his head slightly.

Miharu felt a little guilty about the ease with which Yoite believed him, but immediately put aside any qualms saying himself that he was in the wrong and so it was right to do something for him even at the cost of ignoring his will.


	11. country life

**I don't really know how to apologize for this delay in publication. Unfortunately now I don't have much time for fiction, but I really want to stress that this fiction has been completed with chapter 22, I just have to translate the various chapters.**

**I hope in a short time, but in any case do not be afraid that the conclusion will be.**

**About this chapter. Personally I love the countryside, this despite me being in all respects a city girl. My only weakness are the insects, which on the other hand are also an issue in my humble terrace, even though I pretend they don't exist. I've always seen Yoite as a type suitable for open spaces and simple life, in contact with nature, rather than with a city life immersed in technology.**

* * *

Miharu didn't hate almost anything, but in return the list of things that he considered annoying was so long that he was struggling to remember it all.

The noisy people who spoke too loudly, the people who fidgeted for a trifle, the rainy days and the school. Until that time he had been convinced that at the top of the list there were these particular annoyances, but after spending the last hour chasing the chickens that had no intention of getting caught Miharu had decreed that country life deserved the first undisputed place among all that was more annoying on earth.

They were only off the bus that morning, less than three hours before, but Miharu already longed to back off and go back into town.

He was never interested in being understood by others, let alone feel empathy with anyone, but at least on that occasion he felt a certain satisfaction to hear the lamentations of his classmates and then know that he isn't the only one who thinks so.

- Umino sensei, we can rest?

- Those stupid chickens made me run for centuries, I'm tired!

- There is coca cola?

- I'm hungry!

The man ignored with a sweeping gesture of his hand all the complaints that rained down on him as he passed close to the group of the first class, smiling good-naturedly and avoiding shamelessly to answer.

Miharu glared at him for this, momentarily putting aside the gratitude he felt toward him for the help he had given to Yoite. Thinking about his companion Miharu at least had the desire to shop around to look for him somewhere, though frowned even more at the thought of how unfair it was that the various classes should follow different activities.

They had managed to stay together on the bus, yes, but it was not exactly a vivid reminder considering that both fell asleep almost immediately.

Miharu squinted to his research, glancing various groups of children scattered around the farm until he recognized him with some of his classmates in the middle of a field. He sensed that they were burying something, tearing weeds and digging the earth, and that certainly this was a much harder job than his.

His first reaction was to worry about, judging Yoite weak watching his frail appearance, but in spite of himself Miharu was later forced to admit that he looked absolutely fit. Actually Miharu don't remember ever having seen him so active, and although with a bit of bewilderment he accepted the fact that Yoite seems to be enjoying.

The child didn't know _how_ and _why_ Yoite should find pleasant to be in a dirty ground under the scorching sun, but preferred to defer on such details. He admired rather than his face was more colourful than usual, perhaps flushed because of the heat, but it was also glad not to have to work at his side since he was reasonably certain of not having the energy and the desire to match his commitment.

- Children, closer to me!

Miharu forced himself to look away from Yoite to fix suspicious the Professor Umino. The man was holding several baskets, and immediately handed these to each child who had approached reluctantly.

- Now you will have to engage in the apple harvest - he said cheerfully. - Then you can have lunch with the fruit you have collected personally.

- Apples? I want chocolate! - protested a little blonde girl with indignant tone.

She was immediately supported by all his companions, and also Miharu couldn't help but agree with her. However it was also realistic enough to understand that no protest would have convinced the teacher, so he took advantage of that moment of confusion to run away without being noticed.

He stopped after reaching the haystack, deciding that it was a good place to hide. Miharu struggled to climb to the top, going forward only out of stubbornness and moved by the thought that giving up he would have to return to forced labour. He reached the top with a sigh of relief, realizing only at that time than he was actually tired.

The haystack was done with the fragrant hay and wild grass, wrapped in a fragrance indefinite that the garden's lawn would never have been able to convey. Miharu you lay down on it with caution, knowing that with an abrupt movement he would fall. From there it was possible to see only the sky, deep blue and crystal clear. Made him recall the Yoite's eyes, decreeing then with absolute seriousness that his colour was most beautiful.

This idea warmed him, such as when Miharu was delighted to discover that Yoite was the best student of his year admired by professors. He felt uncomfortable receiving compliments, but at the same time he was happy if was Yoite the one praised; a thought absolutely clear but complex enough to push him to not think about it too much.

Miharu closed his eyes and let himself be lulled by the sound of the wind that discreetly tickled his skin, allowing himself to relax and not think about anything.

* * *

Miharu had not meant to fall asleep in that place, so initially when he heard a voice calling him - still too far away to recognize it - not including why he was struggling so much to get back polished.

- Miharu!

- Yes...

He realized that he muttered that answer with his mouth closed, he annoyed the same when that voice kept calling him. Miharu tried to ignore it and call sleep, groggy enough to have no problems doing it, but when the voice suddenly became clear and transparent found himself open his eyes in surprise recognizing that belonged to Yoite.

- Miharu! What are you doing up there?

Yoite knew anyone would react in some way to being called suddenly, but he didn't think that Miharu could surprise to the point of forgetting where he was. The movement that the child did to lean over to look at him was too sudden, and after a single crunch the barn gave way under his weight.

During the fall Miharu squeezed his eyes shut, preferring not to look at the moment when he would have collapsed to the ground, and then reopen them prudently when he realized that the impact was much less violent than expected.

The hay that had entered into his mouth made him cough, taking away his breath before he could investigate what happened. Miharu coughed for a few seconds, with watery eyes and burning throat, until he was able to breathe again normally.

- Miharu, is everything ok?

He gasped, lowering his gaze immediately. So looked Yoite's eyes that staring at him worriedly, messy clothes and hair covered with grass and hay. Miharu blanched in understanding that he had fallen on him, and therefore Yoite's body had cushioned his fall.

- I'm sorry! - exclaimed. - I ... you got hurt? I'm going to call someone and ... no, but I do not want to leave you here alone. Can you move? It's not like you broke something or...

His river of words increasingly confused stopped when Miharu gasped to hear Yoite's laughter. He looked at him amazed and confused; not understanding why he was laughed suddenly, but couldn't help but be enchanted by the sound. Miharu thought it was the first time he saw Yoite laugh, so innocent and free from insecurity, and if he had not been yet too worried would stay to listen to him all afternoon.

- ... Yoite? - called him hesitant. - But are you okay?

- ... Yes, sorry... it's just ...

He didn't finish the sentence, still finding hard to stop laughing, and looking at his messy look Miharu realized that them had the same appearance in that time: covered from head to toe of hay. Then he realized that probably Yoite was amused by this and he was offended by his reaction; but even if he wanted to protest, telling him that he had seriously feared that he had done wrong to him, in the end he remained silent.

Instead Miharu waited that Yoite calmed down alone, not daring to disturb him at such a rare condition in which he wasn't putting the thoughts of others at first place.

- Miharu…

- Yes? - he asked, thinking that Yoite's voice was a bit hoarse and not knowing if this was due to his hilarity attack or the fatigue of the day in general.

- Could you get up, please?

Miharu he was astonished by his quiet request, realizing only then that he forgot to get off his stomach. With the certainty of being blushed immediately he hastened to move, nearly tripping in his haste, and then sat down next to him when Yoite sat up as if nothing happened.

- Really are you all right? - he asked again. - I fell right on top of you...

- Miharu, have you ever looked yourself in the mirror? You are so light that you couldn't hurt me even if you wanted to.

- And how do you think you are? Are you even skinnier than me - Miharu said, slightly piqued.

He refrained, however, from telling that also they were the same height for not putting him uncomfortable; sensing that Yoite intimately was suffering for his growth so slow.

- I don't trust much of your "I'm fine" - he admitted a bit reluctantly. - You might have something broken and you wouldn't tell me anything.

Honestly Yoite couldn't deny, aware that there was some truth in Miharu's accusation, even though he personally didn't consider wrong avoid disturbing others with his problems. However he preferred to remain silent, feeling too good mood to start a similar discussion at that very moment. Instead he stood up to show him that he was really ok, going to pick up the apples that had brought with him and that were scattered on the ground during the impact.

- Here, I got them for you - he said, handing one to Miharu.

Yoite smiled when he accepted the fruit and sat still at his side, taking in turn an apple in his hand

- The owner of the farm asked at my class to collect them from the trees, and we have taken a bit for us - he explained.

- Was it tiring?

- No, not much.

Judging his expression Yoite realized that Miharu apparently didn't trust at all even of his "not much", and still he chose not to speak; not telling him that sometimes exaggerated and was too apprehensive.

- The freshly picked fruit from the tree has a different flavour from the one bought at the grocery store - he said.

- ... Really?

- Eat it.

Miharu nodded obediently and gave a small bite of the apple, but without being able to hide a total disinterest. He had however decided to pretend enthusiasm for not to disappoint Yoite, and already certain of having to simulate he was astonished when he found the fruit's flavour much more intense than what he was used to.

- It's good - he said sincerely, with unexpected emotion. - I have never liked apples, but this is really good.

- This evening you have to try the vegetables harvested today, everything is good when it is so fresh.

Miharu realized that Yoite had just made a subtle hint to their eternal struggle, but instead to reply, as always, that he would never ate vegetables - probably the first and only occasion on which he refused to satisfy a request of him - he ended up nod in a vague way.

He didn't promise anything, but Yoite smiled satisfied.

Watching his smile Miharu could not help but think again of how his attitude was more vital, spontaneous and peaceful, and he found himself staring at him intently.

- Probably a country life suits you... - commented absently.

Anyone would find it absurd considering his intelligence, more adapted to an environment of academic elite, yet Miharu found natural to think so.

Yoite hesitated before answering, then nodded slowly.

- Yes ... I like - he said.

Not added that his enthusiasm was perhaps only due to the fact that, after having lived all his life closed within the four walls of the dark cellar, now be in those endless fields seemed almost like a miracle.

He watched with a careful look the landscape around him, remembering that his professor had talked about the fact that anyone could have entered into that school.

- If you will be fine we could attend high school here - he said, slightly hesitant. - Only if you really want it, though.

Miharu is embarrassed to realize that his lack of enthusiasm for this day had been so blatant as to push Yoite to repeat in this way that he would never forced him to attend an agricultural college. Then the embarrassment became a surge of joy in realizing that he hadn't even thought of doing projects for himself alone, as if Yoite couldn't conceive of going to that school or anywhere else without him.

- Okay, we come here – Miharu said on impulse.

His slight uncertainty disappeared when Yoite's face lit up at his answer, thinking without more any insecurity that if it was to make him happy he would follow him in that place; sowing fields and chasing chickens.

- ... But on the vegetables I keep my right to consider this a food for cows - he said, lying on the ground above the hay that had spread around them.

Miharu was satisfied when Yoite imitated him, going to lie down beside him. He too was smiling for his answer, and didn't seem eager to make him change idea as ever. Instead Yoite closed his eyes with tranquillity, and knowing his behaviour Miharu was certain that a little later he would fall asleep.

He hesitated a moment before doing so, fearing they would really threatened to stay there until dinner and maybe to mobilize everyone else to look for them, but in the end he couldn't resist the temptation to cling to the Yoite's side and close the eyes in turn.


	12. what's right to do

**I really enjoyed writing this chapter, longer than usual.**

**To clarify a question: is it true that seems foolish to think at Yoite as a person who is opposed to violence when considering that, in addition to kill many ninja with Kira, he has clashed often with the enemies of the moment; yet for me it is undoubtedly true. All that Yoite has done in the period of his life inside the world of Nabari was a forcing of his personality, who has returned sincere and clear from since he has left the Kairoshu with Miharu. A person who "think of the happiness of others before its" can't be at ease to hit someone.**

**As always thanks to everyone who commented **

* * *

Yoite leaned his arms against the fence, watching the big, fat pink pigs on the inside who ate with eagerness what had just been given to them.

He was really happy for that experience, he can say with the utmost sincerity, but at the same time if he thought that in the early afternoon they would take the bus to go home he couldn't help but saddened. Because the idea inevitably led him to reflect on the fact that this wasn't his home, that he had never had a place that he could consider such, and that sense of strangeness was always painful.

- Miharu...

Yoite thought of him almost without realizing it, calling him softly, and he calmed down immediately. He still was afraid of making a mistake to depend on a child, wishing that was instead Miharu to need his presence, but Yoite was slowly beginning to accept his feelings. In a world undefined Miharu was like a solid foothold, a vivid splash of colour in a painting in black and white, and he couldn't help but reach out and grab him.

- Hey Sora, what are you doing here alone?

Yoite was startled to hear that voice behind him.

He wanted to not do so, believing that Yoite was now the only name that could make him react, but he couldn't. Similarly he was forced to look back even if he wouldn't want to do it, and supported the eyes of the guy who was staring at him.

At the beginning of the school year Yoite had been surprised to discover that Taro was still attending the last class of primary school, sure to remember that he had now 13 years old, and after he had learned from Miharu that the boy had failed to middle school.

Yoite he had felt sorry, but he had immediately repented of his attempt to encourage him when Taro's reaction was to get angry and accuse him of being the cause of everything. Yoite honestly didn't think to have some role in this rejection, although he was really convinced of this after Miharu's persuasive work, but it was clear that Taro instead believed in it; or at least he found satisfying this conviction.

- The factor has asked me to check the pigs while they eat - Yoite said after a brief hesitation.

The demand for Taro had seemed perfectly normal, even friendly, but he found difficult to seriously hope that the boy had not approached him for a fight. He also knew that ask not to be called Sora would have been a provocation, but in the end he couldn't refrain.

- ... My name is Yoite anyway - he said, lowering his voice.

Taro didn't reply right away, staring at him so intensely that Yoite felt uncomfortable, then abruptly abandoned his calm to appear rather cold and hostile; the attitude that Yoite knew well.

There were times when he believed that Taro's anger was preferable to the distance at which he was held by the other children in their home, that physical violence at least had the merit of making him feel real, but now he didn't considered this idea when the boy hit him with a punch on the shoulder and a rush of pain exploded along his arm.

- I don't give a damn what is your name, but a little monster like you shouldn't dare to correct me - warned him Taro. - I make myself clear?

Yoite clutched his arm without saying anything, just hoping not to have to be forced to hide a bruise in the coming days, knowing that Miharu would find suspicious to see him wear long-sleeved shirts

- I said: _I make myself clear?_

- Yes ...

When Taro nodded, satisfied with his answer, Yoite thought that he would go away, instead the boy stared at him without saying a word. Not knowing what else to do he continued to check the pigs as he had been asked to do, trying to ignore the pain of his arm already numb.

Even looking elsewhere Yoite felt Taro's eyes that staring at him as only Miharu did, and he wonders how two looks could be equally intense but give him the feelings so different: one radically negative, of tension and discomfort, and the other only positive.

Miharu impelled him to hope that their moments together could last forever, Taro only made him anxious.

- You commit yourself a lot.

Yoite was startled to hear Taro's sudden declaration, but he didn't give him time to respond.

- You go well in school - he continued. - The teachers talk about you even in my class, the little genius good at everything.

- Not so, I'm not ...

- Hadn't we just clarified that you mustn't contradict me?

Yoite had replied instinctively, as he always did when someone commented that way his high school career, but this question made him stiffen again. Taro looked at him threateningly for a moment, then spoke again.

- Yes, you are really good and you commit yourself a lot.

- Thanks... - Yoite said with uncertain tone.

Even if he wanted to think that the boy was simply doing to him compliments, he couldn't be so naive as to believe it; but even with this knowledge his next statement wounded him.

Taro had approached him even more, watching him a few inches away.

- Yeah... - he said, - you are like a pathetic stray that licking people's hands for a caress. Aren't you ashamed for who you are?

Yoite blushed with mortification, aware that those words were going to banter an insecurity that he had always brought inside. He couldn't deny that a good part of his commitment was motivated by the desire not to disappoint others, to make they happy and satisfied, so even if he wanted to he couldn't have objected Taro's accusation.

Yoite averted his gaze again and instead stared at the pigs, without making a sound. He hadn't believed that this attitude could be provocative, so he was surprised by the boy's shooing.

- You don't afford to be arrogant simply because you've got decent grades in school! - Taro said. - You are an error that nobody wanted, your dad wants more good to us orphans rather than to you. Indeed, it is more correct to say that he hates you and he would like that you had never been born. Do you understand? Nobody wants you.

- It isn't true!

Yoite replied loudly before he could really understand what he was doing, moved by an impulse enthralling that was born only by the thought that there was Miharu, that at least he truly loved him and wanted him in his life.

Yoite didn't think that by doing so he would have fuelled Taro's anger, but even if he had been aware of the danger he wouldn't be able to react when the boy suddenly grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and shoved him violently inside the fence.

- Let's see if at least the pigs want you - Taro said with sarcasm.

Yoite coughed spasmodically when the mud ended up in his mouth, feeling himself tremble for boy's guffaw. He felt Taro's hatred too clear to be ignored, and he found difficult to bear the weight of that feeling even if he not harboured any affection for him. Yoite wanted no one hated him, it was always his desire more intimate, but at that point he knew it was an pointless hope.

He tried to get up but ended up slipping in the mud and fall again, realizing with a hint of panic that he would never be able to go out without the intervention of someone. With the back of his hand Yoite removed his dirty hair from the eyes to look Taro, renouncing at his eventual help when he saw him leaned against the fence with mocking expression.

- Hey, you know that in the movies the pigs are always used to get rid of the bodies? - Taro commented. - They like human flesh.

Rationally Yoite _knew_ it was only a joke, but he found, however, more difficult to breath when a pig twice as big as him nuzzled against him with interest. He put a tentative hand on its snout, and he relaxed after realizing that the pig was simply accustomed to humans. So he tried to hold on to its back for to stay in balance and reach the fence, but immediately slipped.

It was foolish to hope that Taro would help him to get out, Yoite was certain of this, and yet he extended his arm towards him.

- I can't go out alone - he said slowly.

The boy was taken aback by his gesture, expecting that Yoite would begin to cry and certainly not that he could ask for help so quietly.

- You're _seriously_ asking me to help you? - investigated.

- Please.

Taro eyed him suspiciously for a few moments, and then surrender to the evidence that Yoite was really serious. He found him so freaked out by this that he almost lost the desire to denigrate him, shocked that anyone could be so foolish as to wait confident the help of those who, to begin with, had put him in trouble.

- You're crazy - Taro decreed. - Completely. A little crazy monster. Tell me, why should I help you?

- ... Why should not you? - Yoite said. He started talking in low tones, then raised his voice gradually. - I think there is no need a reason to help someone. It should be natural.

He sincerely believed in what he said, although he didn't understand why those words had come out just now, but equally he didn't expect that Taro was persuaded by them. The boy gave him one last look startled, then he frowned.

- Stop saying stupid things! - he exclaimed.

He took a handful of mud and threw it against Yoite, forgetting that brief moment of confusion that had taken him. Taro annoyed when he didn't hit him, only touching his face, but before he could try to toss another shot an altered voice startled him.

- What is going on here?!

- Nothing - Taro replied innocently, once established that she was only one of the farmers of that place. - My brother is so clumsy as to be dropped in the pigpen.

At school was enough for him to invent a plausible story and pull off that quiet look to convince the teachers that he wasn't doing anything wrong, but now Taro realized that with this woman wouldn't have been so easy.

She didn't grant him the benefit of the doubt, instead silenced him with a menacing look.

- Get back to work along with those of your class! - she ordered. - I'll refer what happened to your professor. Here the bullies like you are straightened with the hard work, today you don't hope to rest even for a moment.

- That's not fair! - Taro protested. - It was really this idio ... no, my _little brother_ to fall so ...

- _Get out_.

Taro tried again to reply, but gave up when he realized that the woman was taller, stronger and angry than expected. He didn't think she would have dared to beat him, but when in doubt he preferred to distance themselves with dignity.

Yoite had followed the scene without making a sound, torn between awe for her behaviour and the anxiety for everything that had just happened, and he intimidated when the woman turned to look at him.

- Come on, give me your hand - she said.

Yoite didn't understand what the woman was thinking of him, but he was certain that she despised his weakness. Feeling much more miserable he shook her hand and came out with difficulty from the fence, realizing only then to be totally covered in mud.

- I think you'll need a very long shower - she said.

- ... Thank you.

Yoite knew that his gratitude hadn't seemed very credible, sincerely thankful but also too shaken to prove it, and when the woman lifted a hand he thought that she wanted to slap him for that lack of education. He closed his eyes waiting for a blow that, however, was not. Instead Yoite felt a gentle touch on his face, realizing with astonishment that she was cleaning him with the sleeve of her shirt.

- There's no need - he said quickly. - You'll get dirty!

- A little while ago I had to convince two capricious horses to go back in their fence, just look like I'm reduced to understand it. So you think that a little mud can make a difference?

Yoite looked at her, and had to admit that she was really dirty as he was; even though she was covered with earth rather than mud. He let out a smile, and when the woman saw it chuckled back.

- Now I don't pretend to be much attractive, but it's a shame to hide a face so cute like yours - she said, with a shade more affectionate in her voice. - There, now you're already better.

Yoite tried to protest, always uncomfortable for similar compliments, but before he could say anything she finished one last time to rub his cheek and gave him a friendly blow on the back.

- Come on, go take a shower - spurred him on.

- Yes... ah, well... thank you.

Yoite had tried to appear as honest as possible, and he felt a sensation of heat in front of the expansive smile that she gave him in return.

* * *

Yoite had really calmed down with the woman, he was certain it had not been an illusion, but he struggled to maintain this the same calm when he realized that to get to the farm and the shower would have to pass through the fields and then the courtyard; and that, so basically predictable, there was no one who wouldn't peer him with confusion.

Yoite hated being the center of attention for something positive, and still less for the certainty of being judged with derision.

He almost began running to try to do as quickly as possible, but Miharu's alarmed voice forced him to stop. Yoite didn't want to do it as well as he would have preferred that he didn't look at him in that state, but ignore Miharu was a possibility that he can't consider.

The child had noticed him from afar and had run to reach him, but when he came near he gasped; and couldn't tell whether the cause was the race or the shock of seeing him that condition.

- Yoite, what happened?! - Miharu exclaimed.

He hesitated before answering, considering seriously the idea of lying to him for the assurance that Miharu would react very badly to the truth . Yoite hated lying and was also sure that he was not able to do it well, but the thought of nervous Miharu for that story was even more unbearable.

- I ...

- _What_?

Yoite eventually could not hide the truth, not at Miharu who was watching him with sincerely anxious expression, so he decided for a diplomatic ambiguity.

- I was talking with Taro when I fell in the pigpen - he said.

Yoite didn't specify that he was pushed, but Miharu's look immediately became equally angry. He didn't ask anything, assuming that Taro was the culprit with a such readiness that Yoite realized he had underestimated his perspicacity.

- That idiot! - exclaimed.

Miharu started to run and look for Taro, but Yoite promptly grabbed him by the arm. He had feared an his reaction exactly of this type, even if he always surprised that a child calm as Miharu could get angry like that, knowing that Taro wouldn't have had scruples to react violently with him if he had been provoked.

- Miharu, does nothing - Yoite said quickly. - I just have to take a shower, I'm not injured.

He chose to ignore the pain in his shoulder where he was sure a bruise was already forming, trying to look Miharu with peaceful expression to calm him.

- Taro has pushed you in the mud, is not a small thing! - he protested.

- Yes, it is - Yoite contradicted him firmly.

Although such incidents unnerved him, he really believed that it was nothing so serious; certainly nothing that would justify an Miharu's intervention that could put him in trouble, and Yoite realized he had convinced him when the child bowed his head.

- Miharu, I'm fine - he repeated, with a calmer tone. - I only need a shower. Can you drive me to the bathroom and bring me some clothes clean?

He knew it was sneaky compel him to follow him into the house with the premise that he needed his help, but Yoite felt only relief when Miharu nodded. However he did this so obviously unwillingly, still gloomy and resentful, that Yoite didn't dare to hope that he was really willing to forget what happened.

* * *

The bus's steady pace gave him the same drowsiness effect of the outward journey, but this time Miharu refused to fall asleep.

On the one hand because he was too nervous because of the accident of the fence, on the other because the culprit of this was sitting at two rows away from him and Yoite; therefor Miharu was determined to remain vigilant to prevent any his action unpleasant.

He knew Taro well enough to know that the boy loved teasing the wounds still fresh, especially those that he had done to others.

Miharu was so firm in his belief that, in spite of anger, when suddenly Taro began to speak in a loud voice at least he wasn't caught off guard.

- Hey guys, I feel a strange smell!

The boy immediately saw the glare that Miharu gave him, and for answer he raised his voice even more to attract the attention of all the people in the bus.

- Looks like pig's smell - he said, pretending to sniff the air. - Don't you feel it? Mud and dung pigs. Perhaps by accident one is gone along with us?

Taro was still angry for the reproach and the extra work that he had suffered as a result of that history, so he found particularly pleasing to see Yoite blush and try to sink into his seat.

Rationally he knew that the accusation was unfounded, that after having remained for nearly an hour in the shower and having consumed an entire shampoo bottle and bubble bath was impossible that the pigsty's odour still felt about him. However, Taro's voice was too strong to ignore it, and he had to strain not to plug his ears with the hands.

Lost in that anxious state Yoite didn't think of how Miharu could react, and winced to hear him shout suddenly.

- Don't talk nonsense, fatty!

Taro was momentarily speechless, accustomed to the fact that Miharu buzzed around Yoite but not believing that he could react that way to defend him. The child turned without hesitation, staring at the boy with determined and combative expression. Taro was angry for it more than for his insult, not tolerating that a brat like Miharu dared to defy him openly

- Do you really want a black eye, microbe? - grumbled.

- Stay away from Yoite! - Miharu replied, completely ignoring his threat.

Taro was aware that all the other children had turned to look at them, especially their fellow orphanage, and this ignited his will to not give up for any reason the last word.

- And you think I want stay close to that little monster? - he asked sarcastically. - You're the only one so stupid to want to be together him.

Yoite weakly tried to calm Miharu, taken aback by his sudden aggressiveness never seen that before, but he ignored his attempt. Instead he stood up on the seat and looked Taro at the same height, infuriated by his answer.

- You are not worth even half of Yoite! - he exclaimed. - You're just a fat idiot who was rejected at school!

- Miharu!

Yoite was bleached, so shocked by this fight that Taro's insults don't hurt him. He was thinking only about how to silence Miharu before the situation gets serious, noting that the professor sitting in the front row was beginning to look at them.

Yoite grabbed Miharu by the arm with enough force to push him to sit down, but immediately he struggled to try to get up.

- Miharu, calm down!

- No! - he snapped, but couldn't escape his grasp. - It isn't fair that an idiot talk about you that way, because you don't say anything?!

Yoite didn't know what to answer, already struggling to hold him down, but before he could open his mouth Taro appeared at their side. After Miharu's last words the boy had approached him, furious, and now he snatched him from Yoite's arms; grabbing him by the shirt.

- Try to repeat what you said, brat! - exclaimed.

- Your breath smells like potato chips - Miharu replied dryly, without the slightest trace of fear.

- Ugly...

Taro raised his arm to strike him, careless of the teacher who was hurrying to reach them, but with a sudden gesture Yoite stepped between them before he could do anything. He had held back Taro's fist easily, and with astonishment the boy realized how his grip was firm.

- Don't touch him - he warned him.

Yoite had spoken calmly, without raising his tone, and moreover, Taro had read clearly even a tinge of regret in his voice as if he felt guilty for that behaviour. But it was equally clear that he would never allowed him to touch Miharu and, above all, that he had the physical strength to really thwart him.

Not one superior to his, this crazy possibility Taro not even taken into account, but he was deeply angered that Yoite wasn't so weak as it seemed.

- If you want to take his place I will settle you willingly, little monster - he snapped.

- Don't call him so, fatty! - Miharu immediately exclaimed.

- If _you_ don't stop calling me that, bad microbe, I'll break your nose.

- Do you prefer to be called idiot?

- _Miharu_, this is not ...

- But Yoite, he is the first to speak evil of you! Why are you defending him?

- I'm not defending him... I'm just saying you shouldn't act in this way

- _Why_?

- Don't ignore me! I can call you as I prefer because _you_'re a monster and _you_'re a microbe, but you mustn't answer me!

- I'll call you as I want, fatty!

Now Taro was screaming without brakes, and also Miharu alternated a more moderate tone of voice when he responding to Yoite to a boisterous when he spoke to the boy. Yoite was trying to calm both, while still holding himself on alert to prevent any Taro's violent reaction against Miharu, but with no result.

- You may know what the hell is going on here?!

The angry exclamation of their professor startled all three. They turned simultaneously, then Taro and Miharu began to respond with eagerness at the same instant.

- He pushed Yoite in the pigpen!

- This kid insults me!

Their voices came to overlap, but having heard their respective accusations they returned immediately to stare daggers at each other. The professor hesitated whether to try to answer, then decided to talk to the one person who seemed even a minimal rational.

- Yoite-kun, I have already been informed that Taro-kun this morning pushed you in the yard - he said sternly. - I understand that you are still angry, but don't you think it's useless to fight again? Also I have an older brother, some incidents are typical of childhood.

Miharu stood for a moment bewildered, unable to believe that even if in a subtle way the man was accusing Yoite for the noise on the bus. Then he felt blaze with indignation.

- But it wasn't him to get started! - exclaimed. - And Taro is not even his _brother_.

The professor looked at him reproachfully.

- Miharu-kun, meanwhile lowers his voice - he warned. - Then I am sure that Yoite-kun knows how to defend himself.

_It's not true!_ Miharu was about to say, all too aware that Yoite was always ready to defend everyone and was not able to help himself, but he silenced him placing an hand on his shoulder.

Yoite looked at him in a gentle but determined to make him understand that he shouldn't say anything else, and even if Miharu wasn't willing to listen to him Yoite was faster to take the word.

- I'm sorry for the trouble, from now on we will pay more attention - he said, bowing his head slightly.

Yoite hadn't complained of being innocent but hadn't accepted all the blame on himself, and also without feeling fully satisfied Miharu decided to settle for this. Taro instead looked at him with hatred, enraged by his attitude more than from all the rest.

The boy had always hated his calm, his tendency to smile even when he must have been hurt by a bad word, realizing that this incited him against Yoite much more than would have happened if he had been crying like all the other children.

- Well, try to be good - the man nodded, satisfied for that reassurance.

He turned away, giving his back to the threat that Taro hissed through clenched teeth to Yoite and Miharu and the glare that the child gave to him for answer.

But then the boy returned to his seat without doing anything else, and Miharu sat satisfied. Yoite looked at him for a moment, worried, then grabbed his hand firmly.

- If Taro tried to hit you, you come near to me - he said.

- You could beat him?

Yoite found very worrying the flash of hope in Miharu's eyes, certain that the child was mainly thinking that in this way Taro wouldn't have bothered him anymore.

He tried to deny, however a sudden pain in his shoulder silenced him. Even without looking at it Yoite already knew that a purple bruise had formed where Taro had hit him, and the idea that the boy could beat also Miharu appeared to him simply intolerable.

Yoite had never hit into anyone and kept thinking that violence was wrong, however, found himself nodding with conviction.

- Yes... - he said softly. - For you I would.


End file.
